20 yr old not sure what to do.
01-24-2010, 07:04 PM
Wow circledot, your situation sounds really familiar!
I knew something was up with my sexuality since I was about 8 so I just assumed I was gay. But then when I was about 15 I discovered it wasn't so simple cos I was physically attracted to girls as well. I had maybe 3 "relationships" with 3 different girls since then, each one more of a disaster than the last. During these relationships I wasn't able to like... switch off to guys either, and so it just made me feel really guilty being with a girl while I was thinking about guys... So now over the past year or so I've kept away from both sexes to sort my head out a bit, and I'm still not sure! I know I like the idea of being with a guy more than a girl at the moment, but that seems to change for me so quickly. So I think, what if I came out as gay and then felt like I wanted to be with a girl again? It would be too late...
I'm old fashioned when it comes to sex - I'm still waiting for that someone special (man, woman or machine lol) and I'm nowhere near finding that person with the current mess my head is in about the whole thing. Which is makes it difficult for me to get close to anyone. In fact, I'm totally stand off-ish. I never flirt with anyone cos I end up feeling guilty about it either way... And I find it impossible to decipher whether or not someones gay unless they're parading around shouting "I'm here and I'm queer" which (no offence to anyone who enjoys a good camp prance) I'm totally not into at all lol.
Anyways, its good to read about someone else in a similar situation, although I guess thats kinda selfish cos its not really a great one to be in, is it?!
Good luck fella.
I knew something was up with my sexuality since I was about 8 so I just assumed I was gay. But then when I was about 15 I discovered it wasn't so simple cos I was physically attracted to girls as well. I had maybe 3 "relationships" with 3 different girls since then, each one more of a disaster than the last. During these relationships I wasn't able to like... switch off to guys either, and so it just made me feel really guilty being with a girl while I was thinking about guys... So now over the past year or so I've kept away from both sexes to sort my head out a bit, and I'm still not sure! I know I like the idea of being with a guy more than a girl at the moment, but that seems to change for me so quickly. So I think, what if I came out as gay and then felt like I wanted to be with a girl again? It would be too late...
I'm old fashioned when it comes to sex - I'm still waiting for that someone special (man, woman or machine lol) and I'm nowhere near finding that person with the current mess my head is in about the whole thing. Which is makes it difficult for me to get close to anyone. In fact, I'm totally stand off-ish. I never flirt with anyone cos I end up feeling guilty about it either way... And I find it impossible to decipher whether or not someones gay unless they're parading around shouting "I'm here and I'm queer" which (no offence to anyone who enjoys a good camp prance) I'm totally not into at all lol.
Anyways, its good to read about someone else in a similar situation, although I guess thats kinda selfish cos its not really a great one to be in, is it?!
Good luck fella.
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