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So... This is my first post ever... Probably should have been in the introductory section, but I digress...
Anyway I have an issue... I'm gay, and on here that may be a "Well duh!" kind of thing, but where I live... Not so much. You see, I live in Arkansas (I don't kow what you've heard about it, but the nasty rumors are more than likely true) that's right, right in the middle of the Bible Belt... And there in lies the problem. I've only come out to my closest friends out of fear of my parents finding out and either disowning me and/or trying to get me fixed (that's right! And you thought shock therapy was dead... Wecome to the Christian life of gays...) Well most of my friends have girlfriends/boyfriends and I've been feeling extremely alone lately, I mean don't get me wrong, I know they're there for me, and love me, but they're moving on and growing up... I mean shouldn't senior year be my best one yet?! Ugh... I guess what I'm trying to ask is how do you find someone when you're gay, 17, (not all that good looking, but that's a different rant saved for my diary (journal? After all I am a man and diaries are or girls...)) and so far in the closet you found that favorite pair of jeans you lost 2 years ago...?
Any help is welcomed/appreciated...
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Hi and Welcome :-)
The first thing I want to say is, that you are not alone, it may feel that you alone.. but thats not right. I think you have found a right place here... to get in contact with people, get some new friends, exchange experiences.. and talk about problem and wishes and live.
I don´t know much about your .. or any gay life.. in this bible belt but what I´ve heard about it can be very difficult.
I think you can´t do much before you are of age and you can decide for your own what you want and whats to do....but this time you can make good use of by watching yourself and learning what you want to do.
Feeling alone .. yes ... I know, that a problem, what I can say is, come here ... discuss with us, chat with us... and have fun with us, maybe it helps a little. And I think, there are some really nice people in your age ( and older ) here and I´m sure, you can talk with.
I think in time you should build up an own world .. outside with your friends - and you say they love you this is a lot, never forget this - and maybe here with us. And it is not impossible to find someone near where you live..
But as first .. you are very welcome here ....
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Hello. :] Yes, you are not alone. Now that you've shared this on here, we're with you.
I don't know if this isn't a too radical option, but...have you thought about leaving the state when you graduate?
You don't have to tell your parents yet, not until youare old enought to be on your own out there, and I guess you've figured that out already. Um...you find someone by searching for them. Have faith. And believe that you are good looking (how about posting a picture on here?). Have only good feelings for life and try to ignore the bad, as hard as that might be (I can never do it). Have fun through your senior year and try to make new friends. Online too. And then if you move out of the state...
Good luck, keep us informed about how your life is going, please! :redface:
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Shamefully, everything I know about Arkansas has either been courtesy of Wacky Races or Jim Dandy, neither of which probably represents a realistic picture.
The web has made so many more options available to us and it is possible to find people we would never have encountered otherwise. You are very welcome here and if you stick around long enough you will find others, some your own age and others older, who would be willing to discuss things with you. While you are still at home it may be best to stick by the rules, but there will come a time when you can strike out on your own and then you can make the rules.
Unfortunately we do know a lot about religiously inspired nut-cases who think they are pleasing their god by trying to fix us poor gays. It was only about ten years ago that I was lured into a situation where it was "offered" to me ... at my age too! You are right to resist it. It will mess you up and it is absolutely not supported by any bona fide health organisation in the USA or Europe.
Hello and welcome 
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Hi and welcome to GS.
Not all U.S. states have religious nuts in control, just find and plan a move to a gay friendly state. Suggest Utah not a good choice but Washington DC and get a government job seems a better idea.
Here in England its 18 when you are free to make your own decisions, is Arkansas the same?
Just thinking if they put the Guantanamo Bay detention centre in the middle of the bible belt and allowed the inmates to pray with Christians, oh what harmony will would have.
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Having spent my entire life in Kentucky, I can relate to what you're going through. Thank goodness there's a little thing called the internet today, because I came of age at a time when those options were not there, and when I felt totally isolated and unable to find answers or companionship.
I have two pieces of advice for you. For starters, try and keep in mind that you're young and that your life is going to change dramatically once you graduate. And then I would offer you the following tidbit of info that I found on a google search of gay Arkansas. There are actually several gay bars in Little Rock, Arkansas, and The River Market District in downtown Little Rock is a gay-friendly cultural mecca. Likewise, Eureka Springs is considered to be the gayest section of Arkansas, with gay owned and operated bed and breakfasts and hot tub spots and bars.
See, you're not the only gay person in Arkansas. I might also suggest that you either try one of the dating sites or some type of gay-friendly social network where you can meet other gay people your age from Arkansas.
Good Luck on your Quest,
The Antagonist
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As everyone has said, you are not alone. I am older than you (that does not make me wiser, just gives me more experiences) and I lived in a very religious family and had trouble coming out. I even dated a couple girls in fear of my family finding.
A couple ears after I graduated, and was out of the house I came out to me whole family. It was not an easy task, In fact, years later I still have a sister that does not talk or let me see her kids because I am gay.
With that being said, I think it was probably the best decision of my life. I was able to become the real me. I started dating and found the man of my dreams a couple years later. I have been with him for three years now.
Basically what I am saying is you are not alone. this is a hard time in your life. We are hear if you need to talk, because we all know it isn't always easy. I have formed a great group of friends since coming out and most of them probably get more offended than I do when people trash gays or talk about gays and religion. I have come to live with it and know who I am. Those people that do not understand can't keep us down or make us feel like we are wrong, we are not.
Hope you find everything you need and are truely happy in your life. I know it's a tough time now, but it will get better.
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Hi! Are you planning on going to college? I have a straight friend who went to KU. I know that's out of state, but it's close-by I guess. He's the most liberal, accepting guy you can imagine (the first and only person i've come out to actually). I say you'd do great in university.... tons of liberal kids who only turn back conservative years later, when they realize they'd actually like to KEEP the money they work their asses off for, instead of throwing it to the government! 
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*Sigh* ... Help
