I Act Wooden Around Him

[Jay]

Okay consider this as a rant as well.

Well in my previous post, I have mentioned about a guy who works in the same building as I am. We work in two different companies but we tend to bump into each other a lot everyday. We always chat with each other as well.

Now here's my problem.

I am naturally known as a friendly goofball to everyone. I like to goof around. I like to make jokes. I'm a cheerful and nutso lad who doesn't mind hopping like a rabbit in front of his boss and his colleagues. I'm spontaneous and I do not have problem to communicate with anyone.

But with this guy, sigh.

I don't have problem talking to him. My problem lies on my behavior. I become so wooden when I'm around him. I become expressionless. My face barely cracks any kind of expression when I'm with him. I can't make any kind of jokes. I can't act spontaneous. I always have this serious look on my face when I'm around him. I always get caught with his facial expression and body language that I forgot mine. He loves to smile shyly and laugh softly in a masculine way that I could just die (Literally that is).

My friend said I got it bad. Really bad. I admit that I really like him but I would like to maintain him as a friend only - At least for now.

Any ideas on how to solve this irritating problem? It really needs to end as soon as possible.

[fenris]

I seems that you like this guy a lot ... you want to impress him ... and if you thinking about, how to do ... your body freezes in, because you have fear to disgrace yourself.

Try to act like a friend ... be friendly... be nice.. but be yourself and don´t be like a actor who wants to play a role. Isn´t easy as first ... but you learn it... and things go easier

[PrinceMuzic]

Be who you are and never compromise. If you want him as a friend, he has to like you for who you are and not who you pretend to be. It won't be easy, I had this same problem with a guy I liked but you have to work diligently at it.



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[eastofeden]

I did this alot when I was bartending...whenever I was really attracted to a guy I became shy and usually I was anything but shy...I was always flustered and confused by my own behavior because I was usually really friendly and outgoing and I would just shut down and become almost paralyzed. My therapist helped a little and told me I was an introvert pretending to be an extrovert to protect the introvert LOL.

What I figured out after many years is that each one of the guys was born the last week of March and my lover (March 28...and the last three March 24, March 25, March 29)...after awhile I started "guessing" the birthday of any guy I was really attracted to and luckily it didn't happen too often....ALWAYS the last week in March...at least I had something to say to them when I "guessed":biggrin: because otherwise I became mute.

I don't think I have helped you at all I'm afraid but I definitely can relate to what you are saying...

[Jay]

Sigh. I think you are guys hit the spot very well. It didn't cross my mind that I was trying too hard to impress him that I forgot to be myself. It makes a lot of sense now.

Okay I'm going to fix this whole mess on next Monday. I'll do my best to be relax and stay natural when I'm around him.

I can fix this! I can do this! If not, I'm so going to punch myself.

@eastofeden - No worries. At least I know that I'm not alone in this 'wooden' club. :biggrin:

Thanks Fen, Prince and Eastofeden. Very much appreciated.

[Jay]

Okay update.

Problem solved! I have no problem chatting with him like a 'normal' person now. We even chatted personal stuff together nowadays.

I don't care if he will end up as a potential boyfriend or not anymore. I'm just happy to have a new friend to chat and goof around with.

Thanks again guys.