to quote The fly "Help me"

[Mr. Not So Lonely]

Hopefully someone can help with my not so little problem.
All my gay life (I came out at 25) I have been attracted to younger men like 18 to 30,
Even now.
Athough the only men who seem to be attracted to me are 15 to 20 years older than me,and then only for sex EVEN NOW at 50.
Its not that older men are not good as friends, but on a romantic level I just do not find them attractive, most likely because they only ever seem to want is sex.. I am not sure why this is but perhaps someone could explain it to me. THERE IS MORE TO BEING GAY (and a real relationship) THAN JUST SEX!!!!!!
Am i just looking for rejection and pain or am i more like a nurturing father who is gay and wants/needs to fulfill that role. I am very compassionate and caring as well as loving and passionate.
Am i wrong?:confused:
Or am i damned to live out my life unable to give the love I am longing to give,and yes receive?

[princealbertofb]

No you are not damned, but it doesn't get any easier, does it? ... Maybe you should be looking in your age range, five years younger or older... then you might find someone longing for the same companionship, someone who's just lost someone, or someone who's just recently divorced, or got out of a straight relationship which they could no longer stand, realising late that they were gay. The children, if any, will have flown the coop by now, and men often reassess their lives at that point. I'm sure there's someone out there longing for the same love that you want to give... and maybe wanting to reciprocate. Keep your eyes and heart sharp. Good luck, Dave.
I'll add this one for the road...

[eastofeden]

Hopefully someone can help with my not so little problem.
All my gay life (I came out at 25) I have been attracted to younger men like 18 to 30,
Even now.
Athough the only men who seem to be attracted to me are 15 to 20 years older than me,and then only for sex EVEN NOW at 50.
Its not that older men are not good as friends, but on a romantic level I just do not find them attractive, most likely because they only ever seem to want is sex.. I am not sure why this is but perhaps someone could explain it to me. THERE IS MORE TO BEING GAY (and a real relationship) THAN JUST SEX!!!!!!
Am i just looking for rejection and pain or am i more like a nurturing father who is gay and wants/needs to fulfill that role. I am very compassionate and caring as well as loving and passionate.
Am i wrong?:confused:
Or am i damned to live out my life unable to give the love I am longing to give,and yes receive?

I am not going to say you are wrong or right because I haven't walked in your shoes but I can tell you as I came out when I was 14 that I was creeped out by older guys who constantly wanted to have sex with me or pretended to care about me when I was young...doin' it with Gramps was kinda creepy...and I am equally creeped out now that I am 53 at the thought of sex with anyone under 45.....even seeing "twinks" advertised on porn is a turn off for me.

I would investigate someone your own age or 5-10 years older or younger. I have done well and had a great sex life keeping it real with people my own age. When I was 18...I loved other 18 years olds...and I like the same 18 years olds now that they are in their 50s:biggrin: For what it is worth....I wouldn't like guys that are 20 years older than me but then again I never have no matter what age I have been....BUT if you feel that way about the older guys you have to imagine that younger guys might feel the same way toward you?

I will say though that there are younger guys who like older guys and vice versa....I don't have any insight into the dynamics that are at work there but I know they exist and maybe there is a future for you if that is what you truly are interested in...I would like to wish you good luck in your journey and I truly hope you find happiness and love.

[Mr. Not So Lonely]

thank you that helps

[princealbertofb]

take a listen to Alyssa Milano... she's ROMANTICALLY CHALLENGED