I don't know how else to say it... i am unloveable. There is no one who could ever truly feel something for me... nor me for anyone else. I'm stuck in pitiable plane of self depreciation and utter despair. All anyone says is that I need to change the outcome, to believe it will happen and it will... I have tried, I have met people, and I have even liked a few... but in the end I was abandoned only to perpetuate this cycle of sorrow. I don't want to view death as the escape because deep down I still believe there is a shred of hope somewhere... though its light is fading with each passing day. What is there to hold onto in this dark, desolate, detestable world?
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What you wrote sounds very sad and frustrated... but - believe me - nobody is unloveable. Maybe you searched in the wrong places, the wrong people ?
What I can advice is : Don´t watch out only for the only one who loves you.... look for friends, nice people and so on. If you only seach a Lover, BF ..whatever you are not able to see the lots of nice people around you... and who knows... maybe the one you want or need is in this group of people.
We all have times where we feel lost, alone, misunderstood and sad but all this is not a reason to give up.
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Well, anonymous, I would push this a little further by asking this: what makes you think you are unloveable, ie, what are those faults that push people away, in your opinion? Do you think you have any redeeming graces or qualities, such as, say, being a good listener, being a good cook, being a funny person (that one might be difficult)? What are the qualities you can list?
Other than that, what are the things in life that you usually enjoy? We could start building your self esteem from that, couldn't we?
Then, what are the qualities you seek in other people?
Do you know why you seek those qualities?
Look forward to hearing from you...
All the best,  mile:
PA
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try to trace my posts from my previous account. the one that says "The Virgin" as guest, and see all the responses I got from the members at that time. and you'll feel better. :-)
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I know how you feel. I felt the same way a little while ago, but I have pulled through as best as I can. Sometimes you will meet someone out of the blue who will be able to pull you out of that way of thinking. Or see a therapist, that is what I ended up doing, and she was very helpful in helping me disprove those negative thoughts.
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This is the type of stuff that breaks my heart. Because I know in my heart that no one is unlovable. I felt that way forever. it was not true. You just have to never give up. Someone WILL come along.
Mick
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when i am in a situation like u
how i deal with it is to think of much worse situations that might happen on myself, like being hated by all the people i met, being looking down by all my friends and family, being scold and abandoned or tortured etc. usually in my imagination, i end up dying in a countryside where people rare to go. And my corpse is being eaten by wild animals. I disappeared in the world while no one care...or maybe they feel happy that ultimately i am finished, even hold parties for my death...
then i drag myself back to reality, figuring out the situation is not that bad, and appreciate the things i still have in my life, and then i feel better
i hope this would help
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i know exactly how you feel because im usually like that myself but no matter what i say to myself things will be better and im glad you told us becaause were here to help and someone will find you.
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I've definitely have felt that way.... and had one too many disappointments in recent years. So, I am trying to not focus on that, but on other things... working out more, my writing, etc. I feel like I need to make change in my life before I can see change in my love life. It's definitely hard at times, especially when the most recent was so wrong about me, but sometimes all we can do is give our feelings time and focus on other ways to bring us joy.
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It's so easy to feel down about yourself. We have all been there, and we all have those negative thoughts at times. But you should know that a person is not his or her thoughts. You may think you're unloveable but that doesn't mean that you are.
Right now you are feeling lonely, frustrated, afraid etc... But what are any of those emotions doing for you besides making you feel lonely, frustrated and afraid?
I know its much easier said than done, but first and foremost, without the incentive of what the future may bring, or what the past has brought, you need to really get to know yourself and love yourself. If you really get to know yourself then you'll realize, whether someone comes along or not, that these negative thoughts of unlovability are baseless and inconsequential.
<3
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