Am i overreacting?

[puma199115]

I know I over react about some thing and my main question is I wanna know if im over reacting in the situation im in now. I must warn you its a long story.

Me and my boyfriend will be celebrating our one year anniversary at the beginning of october and i wanted to do something special for it. I've talked to a couple of my friends who have been or are in long term relationships and most of them have told me that they forget what they did for it and I don't want to forget.

I came up with the idea of going to Montreal for a weekend. we only live an hour and a half away and i've been saving up money for a while and i've never been so i thought it would be a good idea to go somewhere new. At first i had to sell him on the idea because he thought it was too big, and since we both have never been to montreal before, he said he wanted more than a weekend. (I wondered why time mattered because i know it wont be the last time we go)

ANYWAYS, we had plans to go and i've been looking at hotels for a couple weeks and he thought of an idea of going somewhere warm instead. We have a week break at the end of october so it was close enough to be part of our anniversary and it was our first real vacation together. But the thing is, he wants to go in a group because he thinks that it would be boring to go to a resort just the 2 of us because he wants to party more (which i was kinda offended by). The other thing is, its all his friends because I know mine wont want to go and I am friends with them but not like he is.

on top of this, his friends want to go in february now when its more expensive and farther away from our anniversary. They already talked about where they want to go and didn't even really ask me. I kinda feel like my idea of something special totally just got vetoed by his friends and i that my thoughts on the situation don't matter anymore.

I dont know if i'm over reacting and if I am, tell me. But if not, how can i talk to him about this without seeming like im ruining his plan.

Thank you, and btw i know my grammar is bad, dont judge

[OrphanPip]

Oh, I'm judging

I don't think you're overreacting, it's understandable to feel like a spring break trip down South isn't quite an anniversary celebration. Maybe you can compromise and do something smaller for your anniversary, but you did kind of plan something first.

[posterpicture]

I would dump my boyfriend if thing like that happen to us. Just saying.

[Vigilias]

I don't think you're over reacting at all.

Your boyfriend is being insensative in giving little regard for your feelings about what is a special time for you both. How could he allow his friends to hijack your special time!

I thought you said you were paying anyway, "He who pays the piper calls the tune!"

Speak to him about it and get it sorted and if not tell him he'll answer to ME!

[jeffrey]

Seems like a little romantic getaway for just the two of you would be nice. I don't think you're over reacting at all. Hope it works out for you.

[jbrowder24]

My older sister invited my parents to go with them on their 10-year-anniversary trip - and actually I was invited too, but declined due to a few reasons like missing too much work and distance. Granted, she also has two daughters so it wasn't going to be a completely alone weekend anyway, and at least one night my parents can babysit. But my point is some people enjoy things more with others around, and it doesn't necessarily mean anything bad. What you have to figure out is what it means in your case... why is it that your boyfriend would prefer friends over a romantic getaway with the two of you... is it just his preference and not indicative of his feelings to you.... or is it a sign of something more? Depending on the answer, I wouldn't be as harsh as some of the above - you love him for who he is right? But you also need to make sure he still loves you enough to realize that an anniversary is important.

[fredv3b]

I think a weekend in Montreal sounds an excellent anniversary celebration. You're not over-reacting. If I were you I'd tell him that he's going to Montreal in October.

[Crs30]

I don't think you're overreacting either. The short answer here is tell him how you feel. You want time with him for your anniversary. You can still go on trips with him and his group of friends, but you want time with just the two of you. If he can't agree to that, then maybe there's something more to it. He should be able to respect some personal privacy with you for a little while, and if not then find out why.

[dfiant]

Too bad, your boyfriend doesn't realise what he has. Most guys here would love to have someone like you as a boyfriend and would be thrilled to have a weekend away to celebrate ANY anniversary.

You do need to sit down and talk with him and let him know how you feel and why the weekend away alone is important to you.

If he dismisses you and your feelings, then I am afraid you will have to sit down alone and reassess your relationship and is that what you really want.

I wish you all the best