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Longing for the single life
#1
So i have been dating my current boyfriend for about 2 months now and I find myself getting more distant from him. He says he loves me and want us to continue to be a couple but initially i matched his feeling but now i dont feel the same. I think i want to break up with him but i really dont know if i should do it before or after his birthday this coming weekend. I really care about him but hes turning into my big brother i never had. if anyone has any comments or suggestions they would be welcomed. Cry
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#2
lets warp reality here and look at it this way-

as your birthday present to him you can keep him oblivious to what you are actually feeling inside until after his birthday. or you can give him the freedom that singles have for his birthday (so he could go get drunk and wake up the day after his birthday in bed with three guys he doesnt even know). LOL. of course i dont mean any of what i just said. but the core of my statement still stands. be heartless, or give him mercy for the time you've spent with him.
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#3
What do you mean by mercy this is accually one of the first relationships I have been in so any and all advice is helpful
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#4
If the relationship is turning into more of a brotherly situation, you still care about him, right?

Then, be kind and don't hurt him right before, on his birthday, or even right after his birthday.

Maybe go out and celebrate with friendship you've shared in mind? Another weekend or two of your time in order to not ruin someone's birthday, isn't going to hurt you.
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#5
yeah azulai basically said it. I mean he gave you some warm and toasty nights hasnt he? let him believe hes still with you until after his birthday. give him that much at least. i think you'll feel better doing this than the feeling in youll have in the pit of your stomach if you dump him before than,
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#6
Well he want to do something small and private and romantic and i dont think i can go through with it.
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#7
It's normal for the sizzle to fade a bit... that feeling of first love doesn't last. But real love should, as you find a companion you want to spend your life with. Is it just that the sizzle is over but there's still feelings, or have you truly grown apart - and why is it you've grown distance? Why do you think you can't fake it after two months for one last hurrah, if you still care about him on some level?
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#8
I say wait till at least a week after his birthday and then gently tell him. If you still care about him, stick around. :]
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#9
I don't know if there is a proper answer to this question. He's going to be upset whether you dump him before, during or after his birthday. I can see why you're not up for the small, private and romantic option though. That could come back to haunt you afterwards.

An off-the-wall suggestion, but why not conveniently ignore his wish and get all your friends to meet you in the nearest pub? He'll still have a good time, but you won't be left having to think of things not to say and then have to deal with the fallout when he accuses you of being insincere.
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