getting it off my chest

[Anonymous]

ok so my sister was in a 12 year relationship and got 3 childs to the man.
My brother was in a 7 year relationship with his woman and everything was good.

Then.... my sisters man left her and moved in his own flat. then 2-3 days later my brothers girl left him too.
Now she lives with my sisters ex man :0

Is this something that was planned?
Would you guys consider this a dishonour to your family?
think if it was your brother and sister and please give honest opinion.
thankyou

[pellaz]

no
cultures that think themselves modern dont have the concept of an extended family

[Kyle]

Is this something that was planned?
Would you guys consider this a dishonour to your family?

Ew, that sounds so sad. and it's so strange as well.
I think this was planned, maybe they had some things going on besides your siblings.
Yes, I'd consider this a dishonor to my family. That's not OK.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Planned? No.

The Plan is to find Mr (or Ms however you lean) Right, get married have 2.5 children, a white picket fence and live happily ever after.

The reality is that life is far much more complicated.

We humans have peddled the Fairy Story ending to love for so long we have come to deny anything remotely approaching the truth. we have lied to ourselves that 'true love' exists and that its all about hot passionate romance, and when the honeymoon ends its means that love has died.

We have forgotten the millions of years of evolution. Thus we fail to understand what all of that pistoning of the plunger shaped penis is actually for (to extract competing male sperm before leaving behind our deposit) thus fully fail to recognize that monogamy is not a natural, instinctual way of life for us.

We assume that love means we will be happily content with a person forever, with no need to actually strive to overcome our basic animals needs and overcome boredom, the struggle and all of the other things that relationships have.

Billions are being run over by the raging cars on the roadway of 'fact' while they attempt to cross from pasture to pasture of myth and fairy tale.

These people are, most likely, tragic road kill on that superhighway.

Dishonorable? Only if you see ignorance as dishonorable.

If it was my sister/brother I would sit them down and explain to them that marriage/relationships are a lot harder than they look. I would pull out the decade or so of 'experience' and 'training' I have received through puzzling out my own failures in relationships.

There really are some good sources of information out there, from how to communicate with our partner(s), to the stages of love.

The problem may be only that people do not know what it is they require in the way of advice and guidance in their particular situation.