inappropriately gay???

[Musiq]

Lately there has been this thing at my school where underclassmen bid on seniors to control them for a day -evil face- anyways, me and my last boyfriend broke it off in the middle of december, and thing is for the longest time afterwards he's had this crush on one of the seniors at my school..... and it's like he'll stand there by hiss pic so he can outbid anyone else. Well one of the guys, str8 as you'll see, mentioned that he's inappropriately gay.... I asked him how so, and he tells me, you were the one who kissed in the back of a bus.

point is, i see str8 people openly show affection to each other day in and day out. I know it's considered to be the "Norm" and all, but seriously, gays can;t openly show their affections? In my mind, it makes no sense whatsoever, despite everything i hear about it.

[Cunobelin]

Lately there has been this thing at my school where underclassmen bid on seniors to control them for a day -evil face- anyways, me and my last boyfriend broke it off in the middle of december, and thing is for the longest time afterwards he's had this crush on one of the seniors at my school..... and it's like he'll stand there by hiss pic so he can outbid anyone else. Well one of the guys, str8 as you'll see, mentioned that he's inappropriately gay.... I asked him how so, and he tells me, you were the one who kissed in the back of a bus.

point is, i see str8 people openly show affection to each other day in and day out. I know it's considered to be the "Norm" and all, but seriously, gays can;t openly show their affections? In my mind, it makes no sense whatsoever, despite everything i hear about it.

Welcome to the double-standard. If a man and woman kiss or hold hands in public, it's fine. If two men kiss or hold hands in public, people shun them, mock them, and at times, assault them. It can be equally bad for two women that kiss in public, as suddenly every frat boy crowds around to say how "hot" it is.

Truth is, no, there is no honest equality. It's fine if we're gay, you see, so long as it's behind closed doors. I've spoken with other gay men in different parts of the country who are honestly afraid to show affection with each other in public for fear of possible violence. What kind of crap is that?

As to being "inappropriately gay", there is no such thing, just as it isn't "inappropriate" to be straight or bi. People are who they are.

[East]

Honestly...if I could make a video of this Sunday...I will be in Alameda California as I am the first Sunday of every month...amidst 20,000 people...most of them straight...and gay men and lesbians are openly affectionate and hold hands and NO ONE gives a damn. Been that way for years.

Having said that...I actually have a problem with anyone...straight/gay/bi.... kissing around me......a nice peck is fine but french kissing by anyone is uncomfortable...for me anyway. I don't know where to look. I would certainly support the right of anyone to do it but I don't like it at all.

[dfiant]

Same here East. affection in public is fine, but foreplay is for the bedroom (Or sofa, or kitchen bench) and anything other then a peck on the lips, cheek or forehead is foreplay.

[Thibideau]

This was recently an issue around my area of Ontario. Two women were asked to leave a coffee shop for kissing, which the lgbt community got all riled up about. Then it came out that the two women were going at it quite agressively with children near by, and the man who reported the couple at the time didn't even realize it was two women, he thought it was a man and a woman. It sort of made the community look stupid for standing up for condoning trashy behaviour.

The problem people have is that drawing the line between affection and inappropriate behaviour is usually different between gay couples and straight ones. It's a double standard and usually the people who aren't 100% ok with homosexual pairings are the first to speak up and say how inappropriate such acts are, meanwhile have probably done the exact same act with their heterosexual partners in public.

However to me making out in public, 1 step from full on sex, is trashy no matter what your sexual preference is. If you want to spend 5+minutes in someone elses mouth, it might be time to find somewhere more private to do so then to assume anyone wants to watch it.

I've said it before and I'll say it again. People see the world in black and white, when the reality is simply that we all live in a million shades of gray. I can't control how others will act, only how I react to them. If someone is going to grief you over something so small as kissing or holding hands, then the only question you have to ask yourself is how are you going respond? The answers to questions like that are what help to define us as people, as a couple, as a community.

Not that I've ever been in a situation like that before, but when it comes around I hope to handle it with tact. I think I'm at a point in my life where I'm not really afraid of what other people will do, simply because I've learned I have 0 control over someone elses actions. The only person I can control outright, is myself. Leave out the all the rest, they'll get lost in the gray eventually. I hope that made sense :p

[Sylph]

Gosh this reminds me of my friend and his boyfriend. My friend is one of those guys who would be like, "I'll kick anybodies A** if they mess with me or my boyfriend" , even though he's a "fem" and one day, someone pushed him off the top of the steps (which is like 10-15 steps) onto the concrete. All because they were kissing and minding their own business and he got up to defend them, after some guys came over to harrass them. Needless to say, his boyfriend went off it (don't mess with a jock lol, specially football ones ) and beat the crap out of them, only getting hit like once. (sounds like degrassi now that I think about it x,x)

It's sad that people, humans aren't allowed to be able to express themselves, especially with life being so short. Why can't people live their lives to the fullest and not be harrased or hit off of, all because someone is grossed out or insecure? Shame on them I say.

Be as gay as you want, cause at the end of the day, you only live life once and so I suggest you live it your way and to the fullest(trust me, I learned this the hard way, even though i'm only 18)

[Person66]

I'm confused about how this practice of underclassmen bidding on controlling seniors for a day works? What is meant by "control". Is this like those charity auctions, where men are auctioned off for a date like in the movie "Groundhog Day". Or is this something stranger?

As for there being a double standard as to public displays of affection concerning straight people and those in same- sex relationship. Of course there is a double standard, LGBT people don't have the same rights as straight people, that's just the unfortunate way it is.

I feel very lucky to live in New York City, where my BF and I can hold hands or (non-French) kiss in certain areas, I can just tell by gut-feeling where it's appropriate aor not (ie. yes in Broadway, no at the Opera)
Personally wether it's my current BF or my GFs of the past, I only feel its appropriate to non- French kiss or occasionally hold hands, for me anyway. As Dfiant said anything more than that is better suited for private areas, where you can also have sex. I do tend to kiss my female friends on the cheek "hello" as I dislike shaking hands because there are certain things I have to do in advance to prevent my palms from getting sweaty (ick).

As for being "inappropriately gay" I wonder who he thinks an "appropriate" gay person is. Obviously such terms are nonsense.

[pellaz]

where it may appear gays are more promiscuous its the straights that lead the way. The straights have really saturated all the media every where you go. It is just less common to see the gay pda on the street, ALL THE MORE REASON TO DO IT. Safety first tho.

If a couple chooses to make out in public the negativity really says a lot about the people watching it.

reference a okcupid post
Gay people aren't promiscuous. Another common myth about gay people is that they sleep around, but the statistical reality is that gay people as a group aren't any more slutty than straights. Median Reported Sex Partners
straight men: 6
gay men: 6
straight women: 6
gay women: 6

[HollandofFrance]

youre in Texas -what do you expect