Do some men have no intent to ever meet in person?

[Stefan Romir]

Dion Warwick once sang, "A fool can lose tomorrow, reaching back for yesterday."
The best thing to do is carry on without making waves.

[ChadCoxRox]

Dion Warwick once sang, "A fool can lose tomorrow, reaching back for yesterday." 
The best thing to do is carry on without making waves.

Love this quote and suggestion.
On an aside, the great Dion Warwick is often featured with several hits and many other album cuts of her catalogue on the internet station out of Canada called "Soft Side of Soul." I love this station. Soft Side of Soul FB page.

[Crystalcreo]

Persionally, its just about learning about the other beforehand. Some are like me with social anxiety. Which can be much more difficult if your scared of what your friends and family will think.

Though I admit I can't keep things secret like this forever. Add that I acknoledge I must make the decission. That I accept a gay relationship or stsy in the closet.

[Velvet Mouth]

"Do some men have no intent to ever meet in person?"

I don't think it is quite that simple, but is a problem I frequently come across.

The internet attracts... nearly everyone these days. All kinds of personality types.
In particular, it is of great appeal to people who find real world socialising difficult;
this would be a multitude of sub-groups:

- Those with mental health struggles, eg. general nerves, social anxiety, low self-esteem, loneliness and isolation etc.;
- Those with neurodiversities, eg. autism etc.;
- Those who are more introverted;
- Those with limited access due to location, transport, etc.;
- Those with other demands on them and perhaps have little time or energy to spare;
- Those who are taking a break.

And probably others.

These people still want to connect somehow, and the internet and apps are an easy way to do that,
or at least feel like they're doing that.
And in terms of the apps WE use (Grindr, etc.) people are still horny and want to explore their sexual interests,
but in many cases, not enough to actually follow through on promises made.

The trouble is... apps make it too easy.
What, in reality, is an app full of human beings, quickly becomes something more akin to a gaming app;
a one-sided thing you pick up, play around with a bit of what you fancy, then put it back down again.

Forgetting that there is another person on the other end.

_______________________________________________________________________________

I used to be one of these people - in the more introverted group, along with nerves and lacking confidence.
I used to be someone that would make promises and then pull out (with a few exceptions).
As a result, I wasted too much time not getting what I wanted, missing out, settling for less, etc.

In the last few years, that has changed. I know myself more, can communicate more honestly,
and want to waste no more time. When I talk to guys on these apps, my aim is to meet within a few weeks and get to it.

I have kinks/fetishes, and want to explore them.

I can still be patient and more flexible, but all too often I find myself on the receiving end of the kind of person I used to be.
Time-wasters, flakes, and ghosts have almost permanently put me off bothering to talk to new people on these apps now.

People who make promises and never follow through.
People who will chat and chat and chat endlessly, always saying "Oh yeah we will meet..." but it never comes to fruition.
People who will actually set a date, time, and place, but then pull out, or even just do a no-show.

Whether they have legitimate reasons or not, the apps seem to be full of people who are all keen to start with, and then it disappears.

So I decided, instead, to go out by myself, to queer social venues (eg. bear bars) and queer fetish venues, because I figure:
the people who actually ARE getting out, are the ones who are actually out.

The people who can put down their phones, put their dicks away, and actually leave their bedrooms and their houses,
are the ones who are actually out and about.

And lo and behold... this has been successful.