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Getting hit on by a girl...anyone feel uncomfortable?
#1
I recently started a new job where a girl who works in another department further away from my building (thankfully) is clearly hitting on me. Not in a *sexual harassment* kind of way but she is making it very obvious she is interested.

I haven't stated my sexuality at work. I don't necessarily hide it from people I know but I don't announce it either. Because I am masculine most people simply assume I'm straight and have a tendency to ask whether or not I have a girlfriend and I just reply with, "no".

Should I befriend them further to a point of trust. When the topic of relationships comes up I'll bring up the fact that I'm gay.

This isn't the first time I've gotten hit on by a girl and it won't be the last but it's very, very uncomfortable for me.

But the second girl is not easy to shake off. I'm tempted to let her know I'm not into women but because I'm new at this worksite and would rather not have the extra attention from office gossip.

Another part of me is just screaming at the world. If I were straight I'd be one of the happiest men alive. These girls are very attractive. Why can't these girls just be guys?

I haven't had a guy chase me in over a year...Not even one (unless its for sex) but I'd really rather date. The universe is messing with me and it's not funny. =/
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#2
To me this seems similar to straight men being uncomfortable about gay men hitting on them. Get over it and just tell them you're not interested. If need be, insist that they stop. People flirt and are rejected all the time. It's when they go beyond that when it becomes a problem. Then you should treat it as harassment.
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#3
sounds like she has absolutely no reason at all to assume that you're not straight , and she's obviously attracted to you so of course she'll hit on you . the only way you could "do anything" about that is by letting her know that you're not interested . the same way that you'd let a man who you weren't attracted to know that you're not interested either .
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#4
You have to let her know that you are not interested.

Richard


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 2
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#5
I agree with the answers above. I am often mistaken for being straight and have had my share of similar situations. When I was younger I often hesitated about coming out at the work place. Now that I am older, I could give a damn. Recently, a woman who was newly hired was flirting with me. The following day, I knew that somebody had clued her in because she had a complete turn around! LOL
I know that it can be scary, but the best way to live (IMO) is to be out and open.
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#6
First of all Ma'am, just because you are masculine is not automatically the reason they are hitting on you, an admittedly big factor it may be, but I'll have you know know missus, that I've been hit on by girls before and I am not very masculine...alot Wink .

Maybe you're just an awesome person?

But yeah, serz, if I was you, I wouldn't lead no hoes on and come quicker with the truth than a 16 year old virgin.

It'll make things clear, cut and concise, that you aren't interested in her or any other cunt for that matter and that you are happy with who you are, what you like and there's no shame in that.

They can either accept it and y'all can move on and do each other's eye shadow or they can disapprove and suck 20 deer dicks, cause you ain't got time bitch, for non-factor hoes.

Just be yourself, but be clear with them. Even in the face of gossip and what not, cause if they aren't already doing it, then they soon will, before and/or after you tell them.

I personally don't like gossiping(or rather bad mouthing people), but it does happen no matter what you try to do, so get over that Sis, the sooner the better.

Loveya

Honesty is the best Policy babes Wink
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#7
I have no advice for how to navigate your workplace dynamics. Good luck with that.

At the same time, I hope you can take the women hitting on you as a compliment for how attractive you are. Maybe by coming out there, you'll learn about some other guys hoping for some attention.
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#8
Go to a pawn shop and buy a cheap gold band, wear on the left ring finger - Gals will stop trying to pick up on you. Magically.
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#9
Misfit Wrote:Should I befriend them further to a point of trust. When the topic of relationships comes up I'll bring up the fact that I'm gay.=/

UGH.... starting a new job can be a headache when sifting through workplace politics on shit like this.

I'm like you.
I don't hide it, but I don't flaunt it around for show either.
People don't know unless I tell them, and women pursue me, until I shut them down...

I wouldn't say befriend these ladies to a point of trust, out of desperation, but only if things naturally get to that point.

Their flirtatious advances may be uncomfortable, but it will pass when you get to the right time and place of an opportunity to reveal your sexuality. Be patient and don't waste too much energy worrying about it.

I know you don't want the unwanted attention for being gay now, but it will eventually come to that point anyway.

Since your emphasis on this situation states that you want to shake them off you NOW, maybe you should just get it out of the way and tell them, straight up, that you're gay to get it done and over with.
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#10
Yeah the institutionalized homophobia/prejudice really bugs me. Are you really gonna assume that EVERY person you meet is straight? I hate getting hit on by women and flatly tell them Im gay and really not interested and would rather have my left nut removed through a straw made of liquid magma than to date them.(ok maybe not THAT harshly but its a pet peeve of mine)

They shouldnt assume that every guy that they are interested in is straight. By that way of thinking I should assume that every guy I am interested in is gay and that he wants to go out with me.
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