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HI! I'm Gregory!
I'm like 48, have quite a bit of social anxiety, especially around guys that I'm attracted to... How much longer of pain and suffering in this lonely space I created for myself that I have to continue this life alone, doing IT ALL by myself? Just lately I'm really feeling like it's NEVER going to get better for me. The experiences I have with men keep leaving me very empty. It's becoming very hard to 'be happy', positive, and open to people. How do you keep on in life when I feel life keeps shitting on me? I'm STARVED for a REAL and HOT relationship with a man that is RIGHT for me... TIRED of all the BULLSHIT.
Hello, [MENTION=23955]Gregoryagogo[/MENTION], and Welcome to GaySpeak. I can't promise that life will be better soon, but sometimes the rewards of having waited this long for something worthwhile do come late in life. Can you expand a bit on why the experiences you have had with men have left you empty and dissatisfied, even maybe jaded? What have you got to offer a person in a relationship? What are your strong points? Have you, perhaps, been looking in all the wrong places? I hope you start finding solutions to your queries here, but you will have to tell us a little more about these experiences, if we are to come up with hints or ideas of what to do next. Take care.
What kind of experiences?
Teach us young guys. Maybe we can avoid such experiences.

And welcome to GS Smile
Hope life will get better for you Smile
Feeling very depressed today. I just can't figure out why I can't find a guy to 'be with me'.

the 'situation' I was in was my 'gay couple' of them made a move on me more than a year ago, and like, gradually became a 'regular thing'... I'm someone who doesn't connect with people very well... I avoid the situations that make me uncomfortable and I end up by myself a lot, at home... If I was more secure in myself, maybe I could have not ended up in this situation... But the what I thought was "chemistry" was so amazing...he was amazing... got pulled in more and more... I thought I could do the "just sex" thing with him like he was thinking of it... but it just opened all kinds of 'stuff' for me... I think it's over now... after it all coming up one night as we all were out, and I got too drunk and became emotional... I didn't realize to the degree I had 'some kind of feelings' for him. I don't think I'm in love with him, but the way the sex was... for me I felt close to him...

Any way, I'm an emotional mess... i feel that my personality glitches... issues with social situations is so weird... I'm NEVER going to find a guy who DOES THAT (like he did) to me in bed, and still want to love me....

I don't feel I'm ever going to "pull myself together" enough again to 'look good' to someone else. I feel so isolated... and I feel the guys that I'm attracted to me don't even see me. So tired of living my life without love or hope of love. Tired of doing the day to day JUNK with no help.

I hate typing it all out... so much inside... just cried through all of this... 'something in the air' today that it all hit me...
have you tried therapy? I was in a bad place many years ago, and spent three months in therapy. It did wonders.
Tell him when l come up to him and ask to play the record, l'm gonna say: 
''Voulez-vous jouer ce disque?''
'Voulez-vous, will you kiss my dick?'
Will you play my record? One-track mind!
Hi there! You will what you want and need in life. It may be hard but keep trying Smile
I am the angles that hold and surround you

I am the demon you're afraid to meet
Social anxiety?

Experiences with guys leaving you empty? (I would say drained in my case)

Yeah, I get that all too well.

Gotta keep trying though.

Welcome to GS Welcome
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welcome Gregory. You should try meeting people through hobbies.
hi and welcome to GS mate
"when u wake up with me ....I'll be your glass of water"
Welcome to GS Smile
An eye for an eye

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