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Human dating poison? Is it me?
#11
georgemarc22 Wrote:I just got out of a 7 year relationship about a year ago before I was with my ex partner I use to have no problems w/ dating. So about 6 months ago I was ready to finally put myself back out there after being with the same partner for 7 years. Well it's a lot different than what i remember from 7 years ago so I just kinda threw the towel in b/c it was really hard like an interview or something. Now if someone asks me out on a date I would of gone, but those went going so well so. Now just pausing on everything and trying to get help in what I might be doing wrong. I mean like I said I just recent started dating again after being in a 7 yr relationship how to I assimilate into whatever the heck is going on now?

I think you say you are ready for a relationship, but you aren't ready for the meat rack... They are two different things. Maybe the mourning of your 7 year relationship isn't quite quite over yet. Maybe you need to give yourself a little more time 'alone'. Otherwise, see if any of what I said before applies... It must be very difficult to go back into the arena and try looking for the second Mr Right.
May I ask why your 7 year relationship broke up? There may be some connection there.
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#12
We had some issues with hes lack of appreciation of me and the thing I would do as far as taking care of the house, cooking, laundry, etc. We had started getting along nicely & he proposed to me gave me a ring promised he was going to change that he would do his best not to hurt me emotionally anymore. I said yes believing the best. Well i came home from church one Wednesday and he decided that he doesn't want to be engaged anymore. He said he loved me but asked me to take the ring off of my finger and give it back to him. The whole time saying we could still date for me that was the last straw on the camels back. I told him we needed to talk about it as a couple who loves each other and work it out. He insisted further to give him the ring b/c he didn't want to talk about it. I basically told him what was going to happen if he made that choice he still made didn't care until after by then the damage had been done. So for me there was no going back he had a history and I had played Mr. Understanding for to many years.
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#13
OK so it seems you know how to set the tone and tell your side of the story and stick to your guns... Good for you. Sorry it had to end that way... I guess he wasn't that perfect, but you'd made do with him for a while. I see you are religious, so maybe another church goer who is not hypocritical might be a good choice for a future partner, not bar-room sleaze?
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#14
Sorry to read that, but that reads to me like the story of the lady who searched for years for her Mr Right only to embark on trying to change him when they got married. If he really was Mr Right, what exactly needed changing? If you feel you had to play "Mr Understanding" what kind of relationship did you have?
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#15
Marshlander's question joins my understanding that you have let yourself be trampled too often... Now's the time to stop accepting such treatment.
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#16
Hit the nail right on the head with that one it definitely would be ideal to find another church goer who is not hypocritical. Do not see bar-room sleaze as a secure future partner for myself. Being responsible inst going out 4 times a week to the bar and spending $400. No thank you that is def something I can be picky about. It is hard to find that where I live in the lone star state. =o(
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#17
I grew up in a house hold were my mother took care of my father, and I hold those same ideals when it comes to taking care of my partner. He was very emotionally abusive towards me use to call me names say I wasn't worth anything. Never acknowledged that I held a full time job just like him. Yet still came home cleaned the house do the laundry, and made dinner. Basically all he had to do was work, kinda took advantage of me. I left him he promised he would change and would help out. Lasted about 2 years moved me away from my family my friends to a city that I didn't even like for a job transfer. That he told me he was taking weather I came with him or not. Then made fun of me and put me down when I got depressed for being away from everyone I loved, and everything I every know. I was suppose to get over it. So after all thats in the span of a & yr period. As well as many things I didn't mention. I hope you can see way I threw the towel in on him. & years of his BS was enough for me.
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#18
You've come to that point of realisation... GeorgeMarc, welcome among the alive and kicking... Confusedmile:
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#19
I would never be able to live with some one call me name. How do you stand it for so long? Last night, I called my best friend "homophobe" and he cried for 1 hour because of that, I felt so guilty. When your ex called you names, did he feel bad at all?
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#20
So thats awesome and everything but how do I transition into dating. I have no idea what I'm doing. I pretty sure I come across like a crazy special person.
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