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My Angry Grouphome HatePost (getting shit out)
#1
Anyone ever been in the system?

Yeah? poor you.

No? Well here's a little something Dvvico

I live in this place called Victor Treatment Centers....,

It's basically a level 14 grouphome. It's not the best place...it actually sucks ass. Social workers pull all the 'bad'/'behaviourally challenged' or mentally impaired kids (or the drug addicts like me) and stick them here in high hopes of them 'getting treatment'.

Treatment basically consists of a highly structured environment where repetition and force (rather, repetitive force) dominate those who step out of the norm and show a will of their own. Treatment also consists of a bunch of fucking adults breathing down your neck and watching your every move,,, basically forcing you to take meds,,, and occasionally restraining you if you step too far out of a set of imaginary psychological boundaries (let's say I approach you aggressively and you've had a bad day). WELL, I wind up on the floor and YOU wind up on top. Yuppers. Treatment is planned, goals are set, and you are watched like a hawk. ALL those things you did in the past come back to bite you in the ass...afterall, the best way to fix you now is to sum up your bad days and use every little goddamn thing against you. It doesn't matter if we ripped you away from your family because you like to snort dope, we EXPECT you to BE OKAY. ACT RIGHT.

It's very, very hard to be an American Teen in a place like this...rebellious behaviours are crushed, cigarettes are taken, you MUST respect these usually ego-inflated adults no matter what they do or say (at the very worst your disrespect is noted. It may develop into a treatment goal!) You HAVE to get along with your peers (even tho somethings...wrong...with them...)

About everything you do or say is written down in a log, every incident reported, every fart punished and every curse word recieves a lecture.

This place is appropriate for you...if you're a mentally impaired idiot with psychopathic tendencies who can't:
-do simple things like get a job, go to college, etc.
-be respectful even when you don't feel like it
-wash your vagina
-take a joke
-control yourself in the least demanding situations (WHAT I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE UNLESS I SHOWER??!!? -puts hole in wall-)

Grouphomes are terrible but VTC pretty much tops it. Keep in mind lockdown facilities (satan's playground) are being currently kept out.

The house I live in IS DIRTY, I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CLEANS IT, and I AM CONSTANTLY AROUND PEOPLE WHO ACT SO DUMB THEY MAKE ME FUCKING STUPIDER.

THEY ACT OUT on a daily basis (or slang here is blow out) over theee stupidest things, and may even cut on a daily basis for ATTN!!
it doesn't matter after all! It shouldn't affect you, why? Because it's not you whose cutting, silly.




Victor Treatment Center's 'treatment':

-Go to school every day on time.
Unless you have a fever you can't stay home sick. Doesn't matter if you're throwing up. Apparently you aren't sick unless you have a fever. NO you can't stay back! We don't care if you are bare ass naked (we have sheets!) We WILL throw your ass in that van!

-Stay in Class or Say Hi to the Floor
Leave class, I dare you to. I've never seen a student out on the quad for more than 15 minutes unless they go for a walk or have 10 minute breaks (approved through an IEP). If you dare to leave class (I WARNED YOU) you will have atleast two adults up your ass, throwing out commands, basically giving you about 5 minutes before they involuntarily escort (manhandle) you to the 'Refocus Room'.

-Safe Hands Safe Feet Safe Words
When you're on the floor crying like a little bitch because they are adults on top of you, what do they say when you claim you're safe, when you just want them off of you? When you've been calm, when you've 'relaxed your (unviolated) body?'
SAFE HANDS
SAFE FEET
SAFE WORDS

-Clean up THEIR Mess
Sure, all of grouphome kids KNOW there's always that dirty female who 'doesn't like taking showers' (I can smell her rite now!). But you already know it's YOUR job to clean up THEIR mess. They live like pigs, physically resemble pigs, and even act like pigs....Clean up their mess! We'll pay you for it! We're hellbent on correcting bad (or modifying any behaviours, period point blank) behaviours but we don't give a fuck if the fat bitch messes up the house because she herself has no house training! CLEAN! RITE F*ING NOW! WE DON'T CARE! CLEEEAAAN!!! CLEAN IS BETTER!

-Deal With It
Oh god...it's HIM again...the rude, mentally impaired kid who loves to be nice and rude (totally loaded) at the same time! He loves to talk shit (probably sexual) about you and then turn around and be nice AND try to make you his little bitch! SIMULTANEOUSLY!

-Need a Break? REFOCUS ROOM TIEM!
You need a break? Ok....
Go to the refocus room....y'know, the room that used to have couches and carpets?
Well, they made it better.

Too many kids took to many breaks. Now it's literally,
a cement room, about the size of a small kitchen (I will post pics).
No chairs just you and the floor. Don't get restrained or you, like me, could end up getting six stitches in your chin because you go from a standing restraint to a floor restraint (they always take you to the refocus room). Slam my chin into the cement! I NEED IT! MY BEHAVIOURS DESERVE STITCHES AS A REMINDER OF HOW BAD AND SOCIALLY UNACCEPTABLE I AM!

-Go to Your Groups
Go to groups. Sure, they are RETARDED. Sure, I could make and do better groups than they can! But go to groups. After all, they're modified to fit even the stupidest of kids, and the severely mentally impaired kids who like to fling shit and cuss you out.
...The ones who get beat up on and cussed out by the smarter (mentally imapired) kids.

-Become WORE THE FUCK OUT
Stay on campus until 3:30. Enjoy the 20 minute drive home in a crowded van with a stinky fat bitch.
Upon coming home the funnest thing to do will be to sleep or sign up for an account on a website called Gayspeak.
You can request for Personal Time out in the community but don't expect to get it because staff make up rumors about you robbing old people out on AWOL.
We will destroy your life and make it too hard to develop a new one
We Will keep you captive, restrain you if deemed necessary, and carry around and show cards to people that state you're either mentally impaired/emotionally disturbed or both.
We will embarass the fuck out of you. If the staff don't your peers sure will!

It's just so frustrating, sitting in a cement room until 2:30 with NOTHING TO DO because you DON'T WANT TO GO TO CLASS because CLASS IS SOCIALLY EXCLUSIVE/YOU DON'T WANT TO BE THERE/YOU NEED A BREAK/YOU DON'T FUCKING FEEL THE DICK THAT HAS BECOME SCHOOl


Look alls I'm trying to do is vent and make my point that I don't need to be in the system and my loving dysfunctional family wants me back. This is some of the stuff I feel (being a socially acceptable and AGE APPROPRIATE NORMAL TEEN who got stuck in the system because I thought I was od'ing one day and tried to leave the hospital because no one could come pick me up and, shit, I could walk home).

My point: I don't need to be here. I know peers who do. This place is what they need because they don't know how to act. I am constantly being oppressed because I am an admittedly angry person because of all the abuse that I've gone through. Sure, it was turrible! Doesn't mean I never DEALT WITH IT and LIVED LIFE. DOESN'T MEAN I EXPLODE ON PEOPLE. DOESN'T MEAN I NEED TREATMENT.

But now I'm here and it is a shitstorm. Do you know how hard it is to masterbate when staff check up on you every five minutes? I mean, my bed IS the (cleanest) most comfortable place in the whole house....

You know how irritating it is when your room mate who doesn't feel the love because she don't show it back cuts on a DAILY BASIS, purely for attention?

You know how hard it is watch porn here?

Very, very hard...

Well, atleast I got some of this shit out...


Dogrun
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#2
Im sorry but this post sounds ignorant to me. and its NONE of your BUSINESS if someone self-harms. and go learn something, people who cut DONT DO IT FOR ATTENTION. this post is beyond ridiculous.
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#3
Sounds awful sorry to hear you feel this way, cant imagine how it must be to be constantly under surveillance with no privacy, you say you have been abused a lot I your life im sorry too for that, I think despite your anger towards life they should treat you guys better and give you some affection and understanding to make up for the lack that you've experience in your life. im glad you let it out too might help just a bit.
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#4
Hi I'm hoping you have an advocate or responsible adult that you can turn to for support? Sounds like a terrible position to be I I hope you can reach out to somebody who can listen and advise you. Please seek some help you deserve better.
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#5
Sorry but some people most certainly do self-harm for attention, it is incredibly common with those suffering from borderline personality disorder. Others discovered that it is a sure fire way to get attention, because after all any attention is good attention (and a trip to the psychward is even better). Then of course there are those who are genuinely suffering and use self-harm as a way to feel. Anything. My wife was in both group homes and lockdown treatment centers as a teen and her stories are nearly identical to what is written here. I'm sorry that you are stuck in such a horrid situation Turnerdog, I hope that you are close to aging out of the system (and that they don't try to keep you once you turn 18).
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#6
Rosie Wrote:Sorry but some people most certainly do self-harm for attention, it is incredibly common with those suffering from borderline personality disorder. Others discovered that it is a sure fire way to get attention, because after all any attention is good attention (and a trip to the psychward is even better). Then of course there are those who are genuinely suffering and use self-harm as a way to feel. Anything. My wife was in both group homes and lockdown treatment centers as a teen and her stories are nearly identical to what is written here. I'm sorry that you are stuck in such a horrid situation Turnerdog, I hope that you are close to aging out of the system (and that they don't try to keep you once you turn 18).

actually your so bloody incorrect. self-harm is used cause they dont know how to communicate properly and have no other ways to express themselves. go do some research too. and your wife wasnt the only one. I have been in fucking psyche wards multiple times and Ive done self harm. you dont have first hand experience obviously.
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#7
Ivorybenz, your post is ridiculous. There are several reasons that people self-injure, not merely one.
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#8
Glad you got that out of your system..
Why are you in there?
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#9
I'm just glad you took the time to write all that out! It has to feel better knowing if something bad happens beyond what you describe SOMEONE somewhere (on a gay forum on the internet at least) knows what happened!!! Hey, stay connected and tell us about you!!!!!!! please? Luvkiss

Welcome to GS! Wavey
Heart  Life's too short to miss an opportunity to show your love and affection!  Heart
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#10
Sorry to hear about your bad situation, hopefully you feel a bit now you have had a good rant.This site has a lot of advice to offer covering many different problems, so hopefully you can get some help on here should you need it.
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