08-10-2012, 10:40 AM
Theres history... So i live with this guy who I've known my whole life now, weve been friends and started being really close friends about 4/5 years ago. and there has always been this tension? between us even before we became close friends.
Back towards the end of highschool and after (2008) we started cuddling almost constantly when around eachother no matter who was around, and just touching eachother and wrestling or whatever. We fooled around a few times, never seemed to take it any where for what reason or whose fault if anyone's i dont know. We always talked, whenever we got done hanging out we went straight to messaging eachother and this was almost every night. I dont know if one of us got scared or confused, but when i tried to go further or come on stronger he would back down and one time when i tried to fool around he said it was just wierd some times. Everytime he backed down though he would always turn around right away and still seem interested. Oh yeah, he had a girl friend this whole time, who he still is dating, but he always has told me about how he wants to be single sometimes and try out other not quoting but pretty much options. Always going through phases of being with her for hardly any time but keeping her around.
Back on topic, we didnt do anything sexually for a long time, probably a couple years. We always stayed close friends though and hung out alot, touching eachother backed down but was still there and it seemed like we were into eachother still but i dont know.
Weve always flirted thats never stopped till recently. Which brings to the now, had the great idea of moving out together a few months ago, yeah... always talked about how we could walk around naked with eachother stuff like that and chose to move out just us 2 instead of with some friends that we had the chance to move out with. like a week in or so he walked in and out of the shower naked, so i followed when he got out, we saw eachother naked laughed and he kept coming in when i was showering so i got out to follow in his room and we both were harder then ive ever seen. but nothing happened. how i do not know. then shower after shower happened, kind of repeating with little differences. One time we were about to do something and he said thats what we do with girls, we can both get some or something like that. Couple times we started doing stuff, nothing ever really happened though, just a little fooling around that he made awkward after.
I told him i was gay, was kind of coming out to myself at the same time, and then that i saw him differently then just friends, wanted to be more, yadda yadda he said he didnt want that. kinda sucked then a couple weeks later we were chilling and starts talking about his back hurting asking if i was good at massages... next thing were both butt naked and im top of him giving him a massage. but have sex? NOPE.. WHAT THE EF
took a happy ending tho then showered with a locked door, but came out naked and changed with an open door and went to work.
Now for the past couple weeks we barely talk or make eye contact, he goes off and does stuff he doesnt talk about, dont see eachother much.. which is wierd because the couple days after the massage werent bad at all. Will still go out of his way to help me though. soooo did he really just use me for a fkin massage? after all that!? does he have feelings for me? is he just over me? bad timing? found someone else? Even though hes still with his girlfriend he sees once a week... so confused, everytime im over him he does something to bring it back or to just keep his OPTION there? back up plan? or is it genuine feelings he is just confused about. wth is this... any help??
Back towards the end of highschool and after (2008) we started cuddling almost constantly when around eachother no matter who was around, and just touching eachother and wrestling or whatever. We fooled around a few times, never seemed to take it any where for what reason or whose fault if anyone's i dont know. We always talked, whenever we got done hanging out we went straight to messaging eachother and this was almost every night. I dont know if one of us got scared or confused, but when i tried to go further or come on stronger he would back down and one time when i tried to fool around he said it was just wierd some times. Everytime he backed down though he would always turn around right away and still seem interested. Oh yeah, he had a girl friend this whole time, who he still is dating, but he always has told me about how he wants to be single sometimes and try out other not quoting but pretty much options. Always going through phases of being with her for hardly any time but keeping her around.
Back on topic, we didnt do anything sexually for a long time, probably a couple years. We always stayed close friends though and hung out alot, touching eachother backed down but was still there and it seemed like we were into eachother still but i dont know.
Weve always flirted thats never stopped till recently. Which brings to the now, had the great idea of moving out together a few months ago, yeah... always talked about how we could walk around naked with eachother stuff like that and chose to move out just us 2 instead of with some friends that we had the chance to move out with. like a week in or so he walked in and out of the shower naked, so i followed when he got out, we saw eachother naked laughed and he kept coming in when i was showering so i got out to follow in his room and we both were harder then ive ever seen. but nothing happened. how i do not know. then shower after shower happened, kind of repeating with little differences. One time we were about to do something and he said thats what we do with girls, we can both get some or something like that. Couple times we started doing stuff, nothing ever really happened though, just a little fooling around that he made awkward after.
I told him i was gay, was kind of coming out to myself at the same time, and then that i saw him differently then just friends, wanted to be more, yadda yadda he said he didnt want that. kinda sucked then a couple weeks later we were chilling and starts talking about his back hurting asking if i was good at massages... next thing were both butt naked and im top of him giving him a massage. but have sex? NOPE.. WHAT THE EF
took a happy ending tho then showered with a locked door, but came out naked and changed with an open door and went to work.
Now for the past couple weeks we barely talk or make eye contact, he goes off and does stuff he doesnt talk about, dont see eachother much.. which is wierd because the couple days after the massage werent bad at all. Will still go out of his way to help me though. soooo did he really just use me for a fkin massage? after all that!? does he have feelings for me? is he just over me? bad timing? found someone else? Even though hes still with his girlfriend he sees once a week... so confused, everytime im over him he does something to bring it back or to just keep his OPTION there? back up plan? or is it genuine feelings he is just confused about. wth is this... any help??
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
