Tips for dating when you have kids?

[Sylph]

Gurl...

Well, If I had to bluntly honest, I'd say just be as honest as you dare and open as you believe you can be.

I mean, of course your kids come first, as they naturally should, but the more of a big deal you make it out to be, the bigger of a deal it will be.

I never ran around saying, "oh gosh, I'm gay, but I've got 5 younger siblings looking up to me, what do I do?" . I was just myself, and they love me anyway, although my youngest brother is still alittle too young to understand the implications[he's 8 now].

I'm as gay as a 3dollar bill [which I heard exists in some forms of currency lol], and yet, my brothers treat me no different and my Sisters love it, and they aren't even from the same father or mother. [My 3brothers and one of my sisters and I share the same father, while my other Sister and I have the same mother]

Sometimes, the more you make of it, the more it will be.

Let your partner know at some point when you feel comfortable with your compatability with one another, that you have children, because as Pellaz said, you want to make sure she or maybe he[if that's what you want] is going to be able to be around your children, and preferably for the long haul.

If you get a girlfriend and things are going well, and it's time to introduce her to your kids, you must be honest, because if you go around saying "she's just a friend" or something to that effect, not only are you going to confuse your children later on in life, as to why mommy was spending so much time with her friend and why mommy didn't spend time with a male friend, you're also going to be, perhaps unintentionally, insulting your partner, making her seem like a shame or thing to be hidden and not loved and celebrated.

With children, they learn heavily from observation and if they see mommy keeping secrets or telling lies, then this is what they will do and not only that, but you're showing them that mommy having a girlfriend is wrong and that's why mommy is hiding it, which teaches them that liking the same gender is both wrong and something that's supposed to be hidden and regressed.

And I absolutely believe you will do what you believe is best for your kids and I have no jurisdiction in the raising and teaching of your children [unless it's in regards to music or animals :p ], but I believe sometimes you just have to be brave, even with your own children and raise them right and hope they come out healthy and happy.

Strictly heterosexual families, with "perfect" lives and "perfect" children have their own problems and though they're so perfect and happy and blah blah, their children turn out to be rapists, murderers and sociopaths, and though it's not entirely the families fault, as they may have raised them by the book, it's just how things happen sometimes.

I'm sure no parent plans for their child to be a mass murderer, but I'm sure they did they best they could or best they thought they could and only hoped for the best.

So I'm sure that your kids will come to terms with whatever comes their way, so long as their mommy teaches them and makes sure that they know right from wrong and up from down :tongue: .

All you can do really is love them the best you can, and raise them. They will become who they will become, sometimes regardless of how you wanted or expected.

And I'm sure whatever you decide is the best course of action, will be the best according to you and your family mile:

Kisses boo!