date advice

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Be yourself.

The purpose of dating is to get to know one another while having fun. Are you prone to throwing yourself at people for a hug? If no, then don't do it now.

Look at this along the lines of two buddies going to go watch a movie. Straight buddies - don't focus on 'does he like me?' and strive to force him to fall in love with you.

Lets say that you had absolutely no romantic interest in him but he was a friend - what would you and your friend do when you go watch a movie?

Try doing those things.

He is most likely as nervous as you are. It may actually help if you tell him point blank, "I want do be friends first, so lets treat most of this evening like we are best buddies out on the town."

How much is most? That depends on how well you two connect as friends.

I'm uncertain if you two are going to want to cuddle while at the theater. Two men sitting side by side cuddling often leads to muttered comments that ruin the film. There most likely will not be much in the way of public displays of affection (PDA) during this and other dates. I don't know the town you are in or how tolerant folk are.

Do get a (one (1)) large popcorn to share. Nothing shows interest more than swapping germs the old fashion 'through our food' method. Almost as intimate as swapping saliva, but more on the down-low to where the natives won't get all upset and making their comments.

First dates can end with a quick kiss on the cheek. Depends on where the date ends and how much privacy you have. I would refrain from aiming for a 'home run' (sex) on a first date. If you are seriously looking for a relationship, then both of you should be willing to get to know each other a little before intimacy.

So who offered to take whom out? If he offered to take you out, this most likely means 'his treat' - but I strongly suggest you have money in your pocket just in case he has decided that the tickets are on both of you. Snacks - you should offer to buy. Depending on how old fashioned he is, he may beg off and insist on paying all the way. Do offer, but don't be insistent.

Now for casual touch that sends a message of interest but won't alarm the natives nor be overtly sexual.

Sit side by side next to each other. If things have been going well part your legs slightly and let your knee that is closest to him lean slightly toward him and gently brush up against him. If he has similar interests he will press his leg against yours.

Two men sitting side by side with an 'accidental' legs touching is 'safe' in most circumstances. It will convey your interest to him, and his two yours.

If he pulls his leg away don't take it personally. Understand that he may not feel comfortable with the natives all around. So it may not be a personal slight.

I would strongly suggest you steer clear of the 'stretch' and putting an arm around him in theater, not until you get to know his feelings about PDA.

Breath. Most people tend to forget to breath in these sorts of situations. Don't be afraid to take a couple three deep breaths now and again.

And lest I forgot to convey this, be yourself. Yeah I know you want to impress him and coax him into your lair - understand that if you pretend to be something you are not 6-9 months later when you drop this pretense it will not end well for either of you.

Oh and have fun.