On the bright side there are potentials here....

[ceez]

1. he's not the only stiff thing here ok maybe not that one. umm... another, oh, you must be the angle here to take him away. or, would you like to play a game, it's called the priest and the choir boy. or you could always grab him by the crotch and take him to the pantry.

2-5. I would stick to the regular funeral clothes, grey hanky sounds good.

6. people do it all the time.

7. uuhhh lets just leave that out