08-20-2016, 06:41 PM
Ok. I'm going to tell you what you probably already know: Narcissism is considered one of the least treatable mental conditions.
People who have never known a genuine narcissist will never fully understand what you go through living with one.
I made the mistake of marrying mine. The incident I am about to relate started 3 days ago. Back ground: I was in my junior year of college when my narc came back into my life after 9 years of separation. His lover had died and he ~claimed~ that the experience had changed him in a fundamental level. After dating 7 months, he proposed and asked me to move away with him. He said he would support me during my last year of college. That was 5 years ago....still having gone back to college, because he kept coming up with excuses why he couldn't afford it "yet".
3 days ago, he got and accepted a job offer for $40,000 more per year. I said, "Oh, that's awesome! I can finally finish college." A few hours later, he came up to me and started screaming, "You are nothing but a leach! You only make $9 an hour! You are worthless! Don't think for a minute that I am going to let you go back to college unless you start making over $30,000 a year! I won't let you finish college until you contribute more to this relationship!"
It all boils down to one thing--he never finished college, so he doesn't wasn't me to. I let him finish his temper tantrum (took 2 days of me locking myself into another room every time he would start to shout), then yesterday I told him that I WAS finishing college and that if he didn't pay for it I would take it to Family Court and let a Judge decide what I was entitled to after 5 years with him. Today, he acts like nothing ever happened.
I cannot tell you what to do, but take it from someone who knows-- it will NEVER get better and it will ALWAYS be your fault (in his eyes).
Best Wishes,
~Beaux
People who have never known a genuine narcissist will never fully understand what you go through living with one.
I made the mistake of marrying mine. The incident I am about to relate started 3 days ago. Back ground: I was in my junior year of college when my narc came back into my life after 9 years of separation. His lover had died and he ~claimed~ that the experience had changed him in a fundamental level. After dating 7 months, he proposed and asked me to move away with him. He said he would support me during my last year of college. That was 5 years ago....still having gone back to college, because he kept coming up with excuses why he couldn't afford it "yet".
3 days ago, he got and accepted a job offer for $40,000 more per year. I said, "Oh, that's awesome! I can finally finish college." A few hours later, he came up to me and started screaming, "You are nothing but a leach! You only make $9 an hour! You are worthless! Don't think for a minute that I am going to let you go back to college unless you start making over $30,000 a year! I won't let you finish college until you contribute more to this relationship!"
It all boils down to one thing--he never finished college, so he doesn't wasn't me to. I let him finish his temper tantrum (took 2 days of me locking myself into another room every time he would start to shout), then yesterday I told him that I WAS finishing college and that if he didn't pay for it I would take it to Family Court and let a Judge decide what I was entitled to after 5 years with him. Today, he acts like nothing ever happened.
I cannot tell you what to do, but take it from someone who knows-- it will NEVER get better and it will ALWAYS be your fault (in his eyes).
Best Wishes,
~Beaux
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