Im not sure if its ok to get a girlfriend

[MikeW]

...
These are all just lame excuses for not taking your real desires seriously. Because you're afraid to do that. Because if you allow yourself any of that you know that those desires inside you will win and you have nothing left but to follow them unquestionably into the life that is unknown and scary to you right now.

Yeah, but you know as well as I do that you can't save anyone from themselves.

The best we can do is state our position(s), which we have and then some, and hope the seeds we've planted eventually take root. Either they will or they won't and that's up to him.

My guess? One of these days he's going to WTFU and realize that he CAN have all the fun he wants... and more... and it ain't nobody's business if he does. My hope is he just doesn't wreck someone else's life in the process.