Cheating boyfriend - just venting if someone's willing to listen

[InbetweenDreams]

Well first off @"FlyFlyHighUp" I don't think you're stupid or an idiot for not knowing your partner hid this from you. People are not only capable of being complete pigs but they can also be quite discrete and able to hide secrets for quite a long time.

I'm kind of speechless that his lover actually showed up at your doorstep with the intent to tell you to let him go.

I can't imagine being with someone that long but it certainly does feel weird. Like @CellarDweller said, this is not your fault. There is nothing wrong with you nor did you do anything wrong to be betrayed in this way. It will take time to heal, it will take time to feel normal and it will take time to be able to trust someone again.

I'm not sure how I would react to something like this. I mean it's not unheard of to hear about someone cheating, but 12 years you have invested into building a life with someone is a lot. So I don't know what to say, but by all means if venting about it here helps by all means. I certainly have vented on many occasions on here. Do what ever feels right, if you feel that it will help you. I wish there was something I could say that could serve as advice or something inspirational, but I also feel like that might not really be helpful. What I will say there are good guys out there that done lie, cheat and deceive.