Anti-Depressants

[eastofeden]

At the end of the day, doctors may be knowledgeable, but we decide what we put in our bodies. I do think psychotherapy can be by far superior to any medication. After all, medications are not a silver bullet, you still have needs to fulfill to be "complete" (can't think of a better way to describe it). Unfortunately, my work schedule pretty much kills off my ability to seek psychotherapy unless I can do something online. Last I knew insurance doesn't pay for online stuff, but that might have changed due to the pandemic. I used to see a therapist which entailed a 55 mile drive from work and a 35 mile drive back home. The therapist was great but she ended up leaving the group and I decided to stop going at that point.

I could definitely use some plan or motivation to get exercise on a regular basis and yes I do think that helps stave off depression. I don't care for gyms or treadmills though. So when winter comes it usually means depression gets worse. Perhaps I should move to Florida lol.

As long as the stuff I'm on doesn't make me feel like the walking dead or want to drive my car into a tree and actually seems to help I'm fine with it. At least until I can find a way to keep myself on the horse.

I have read and heard many accounts of anti-depressants being either the thing that saved their life or the thing that nearly ruined it. I think the problem is simply not knowing what medication will have a positive effect, one that doesn't cause side effects and addresses the problem. One thought I did have was that we were not meant for this modern world. Where we're expected to adhere to all these things that society expects us to, but perhaps I am wrong. There is something seemingly unnatural about sitting in an office for 10 hours a day looking at monitors.

I just want to feel good, feel good about life and not feel as if I should just give up and throw the towel in. And it's hard to give a fuck about anything, to find motivation, to love yourself enough to pull yourself out of the current. So I do think whether it is medication, psychotherapy or both are things that can help someone pull themselves up. Some folks need this stuff for a short time, others need more help. Likewise, I do think if you can do it without medications you're probably better off but don't turn your nose to them if you need them. Plus there's sort of a stigma about taking medications for mental health reasons, like as if I'm "damaged goods" or something. So there's plenty of reasons why we wouldn't want to get on these medications, whether it's the stigma, the side effects or whatever it is.

At any rate @eastofeden I am happy you found a way to stay off this stuff. Definitely a healthier option working out alone. I know a lot of the older SSRI's like Prozac came out in the 80's but going backwards from that, it seems like the medications were much less effective and more intoxicating.

Speaking of the online therapists, has anyone had experience with those services like Better Help and such?

Prozac sounds familiar - it might have been the drug. 

I think it was a combo of all the things I mentioned that put me in a better place. The exercise thing definitely helped because it gave me a seratonin rush every day which made the depression kinda disappear. There are all kinds of ways to exercise and no "right way" - just what is "right" for you. I started by accident really. In the early 80s everyone I knew started dying of AIDS and I lost almost all of my friends and aquaintances by the time 2000 rolled around. Four of us left that I know of out of maybe 50-60 - plus it didn't help that I worked in a gay nightclub and watched one after the other people I just knew as customers die one by one. THAT was depressing but a different kind of depression - it just added to an inherent depression I already had. I started doing primal screaming just to get a release and at the same time I would go on Sunday morning at 6 AM to San Francisco and dance all day until maybe 9 PM to release the stress and a side effect was the seratonin. I would get soaking wet every Sunday and just dry off in my car and go to the next club so it was an accidental side effect that my depression started to slowly subside. I also found i needed a "fix" so I went to jazzercize the rest of the week twice a day for two hours each day and unbeknownst to me at the time I was getting a seratonin fix because when I quit I felt the depression again so I made sure since then to always have an exercise plan and gym membership whether it is walking or running or treadmill or jump rope ect ect. 

I had a very good therapist who helped me for years and taught me how o help myself - I have never used an online therapist but I would expect that it might be a good option - finding the right one for you is important which actually might be easier online since you can see the options whereas looking for the right one in person might take alot longer.