feel so insecure i want to kill self

[Shadow]

Shadow, thank you so much for writing that, you've helped a lot just by me reading that. I just got off the phone with him, i explained what has happened,i explained my past and he has apologised for triggering it off, even though i stressed that he wasn't aware of the events that followed (Ie now, this state of mind).

As for the friends and shoulder to cry on, my supervisor at work is also gay and has helped me a lot, much has the others I work with. For the first time in months, I also went out with my friends for once and actually enjoyed myself. Thinking about all the fun things we did in one night takes my mind of everything

Thank you for your help. I'm going to go to bed now, I'll check back after work tomorrow.

Night xxx

You're welcome babe. Just remember that even when things look their darkest, and you feel as though you have no way forward, there ARE ways of knuckling down and getting on with things - I went through a depressive bout when I was 19 and wouldn't wish it on anybody, so you do have my sympathies ...

Hope work goes ok for you - it's good to hear that you have people that you can spend a bit of time with ... I'd suggest you look to do that again sometime soon - it isn't to try and diminish or dispel what's happened, but to try and help you get perspective on it and, consequently, exercise greater control over it ... because otherwise it will run roughshot over you, and then things become a bit more of an uphill struggle.

I really do recommend GS - I for one have made, as I mentioned earlier, a few really good friends from it - people that *I* turn to when I need a sympathetic ear or honest advice ... I hope it serves to help you too babe.

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!?!?! Shadow !?!?!