11-01-2010, 02:26 AM
I came out to my best friend, this guy. Now that I came out to him and he's decided to revive our friendship I think I'm slowly starting to like him again.
It's all been good. I told him about everything, my irrational insecurities about my relationship with him and he's been okay with it. Although I can't help but feel that he's just pretending and is only talking to me because he doesn't want to offend me but he's telling me not to think like that.
Anyways, when I came out to him I told him that I only found out about my "preference" a month ago. On Friday I confessed and told him that I knew all along and the only reason I lied was because I didn't want him to feel awkward, like maybe I was taking advantage of him thinking I was straight when we used to act gay for laughs in secondary school. I didn't want him to feel like I wasn't doing it for laughs. LOL
He told me okay and he asked me if I ever thought of him in "that way", I didn't know what to do so I lied again. I told him I always thought of him as a friend. So he started asking why and started pouting. So I jokingly asked him if he wants me to like him and he replied with a smile, a "Maybe.", held my hand and was pulling me in. I panicked and pulled away and then a friend came up to us and we didn't speak for the rest of the day or even up until now actually.
I don't know what to do! Should I ask him about it? What if he was just teasing me? I hate this. :mad:
I can't stop thinking about this and I'm not sure if I even want this if he was serious about it. And then he has a girlfriend too!
Gosh. :frown:
It's all been good. I told him about everything, my irrational insecurities about my relationship with him and he's been okay with it. Although I can't help but feel that he's just pretending and is only talking to me because he doesn't want to offend me but he's telling me not to think like that.
Anyways, when I came out to him I told him that I only found out about my "preference" a month ago. On Friday I confessed and told him that I knew all along and the only reason I lied was because I didn't want him to feel awkward, like maybe I was taking advantage of him thinking I was straight when we used to act gay for laughs in secondary school. I didn't want him to feel like I wasn't doing it for laughs. LOL
He told me okay and he asked me if I ever thought of him in "that way", I didn't know what to do so I lied again.
I told him I always thought of him as a friend. So he started asking why and started pouting. So I jokingly asked him if he wants me to like him and he replied with a smile, a "Maybe.", held my hand and was pulling me in. I panicked and pulled away and then a friend came up to us and we didn't speak for the rest of the day or even up until now actually.I don't know what to do! Should I ask him about it? What if he was just teasing me? I hate this. :mad:
I can't stop thinking about this and I'm not sure if I even want this if he was serious about it. And then he has a girlfriend too!
Gosh. :frown:
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