Why can't I be me?

[SadSilence]

I stare at the road, watching is zoom by and trying to think. But the voices of the two idiots on either side of me telling me what to do keep getting in. For once, just once I wish I could go a week without someone telling me what to do.

Believe it or not idiots, I do know what I'm doing :eek:. Now I know this may come as a shock to you but don't worry I'll be here to hold your hand while you cope with the brilliant discovery. I'm aware that if I don't get my drivers permit thingy soon I won't pass my drivers ed class. I'm aware if I don't get good grades I won't be able to go to a good medical school. I'm more aware than you give me credit for.

Sometimes I want to cut just because idiots one and two won't shut up. (Idiots one and two are my father and sister, I'm not talking about any of you on GS) You try to encourage me with 'wisdom' and 'experience' but all you seem to do is tell me that I won't succeed, in a gentle tone of course. I would like to be me without being questioned for one day, is that too much to ask?

[Nick9]

You can have your driving license for a car at the age of 15, right? And the age of consent is...? 18?

Funny, we have it exactly the other way around.

I got lost in your last paragraph, so I will comment just the last sentence... I am afraid that in your life you will be often questioned many times. You will receive pieces of advice that you won't like and won't need in your opinion.


Look at it this way. If they didn't care for you at all, you wouldn't be happy either. If they pretended that you didn't exist, it would hurt you.
When your schoolmates seemed to not notice you, you felt alone.

Many times in your life you will have people around who will not notice you because they have other friends. That's fine. Sometimes you will meet people who will let you know they don't care about you, just because they will know, it will hurt you.
Then, there will be those, who will hurt you unintentionally with their care.

I don't know where your sister belongs, but I have pretty clear idea where your father stands. And believe me, I know what it is like to fight with a father. I am just as stubborn as mine is.

I know you need to get older and gain some distance and perspective to believe it, so the only thing I am asking now... just consider it.

Have you read threads here at GS about men not knowing how to express their feelings toward their friends? How to tell them they love them?
Not everyone is good with words and not everyone knows how to say I care about you. It might seem comprehensive to you and yes, the world would be much easier to live in if it wasn't like that, but it is just the way it is.

[Prometheus]

I learned a long time ago that I had to set the bar high for myself, since no one around me was capable of saying the words bar or high without getting that excited look on their face. Set a pedigree for yourself. I can tell by your posts that your grades problem is not because you're stupid. But this drives comes about, I think, only when you finally begin to see the world clearly and for what is really is: a big fucking pile of shit. Expect the worst and you won't be disappointed and you'll then become all the more pleased by things actually go your way.

If it's punk kids at school that give you shit---call you names..fuck 'em. It's prolly lame crap anyways, something you personally could have found 10 meaner ways of saying. Those grains of salt amount to nothing.
Be you...I mean, who else could you be anyway? You better start getting used to it. : ) So should everyone else around you. But for the love of god, be a gentlemen, or it's all a wash.

[pellaz]

get the get drivers permit thingy. Driving is fun.

[Nick9]

btw SadSilence, congrats on reaching 50 posts. If I remember correctly there are new board features you can enjoy after reaching that milestone, so have fun

[Rainbowmum]

Get your wheels , you will love it.