Hello everyone, thanks for taking the time to read this. Basically I don't know if/when I should ask someone out. Do you get really close to them and then ask them out, or ask them out and then get really close to them? And how do I know if I'm ready for a relationship - is it just a gut feeling? There's an openly gay single guy I like whom I sit beside in school and I don't know whether I should make a move; I suppose I'm rushing things a bit as there are only about two weeks until we leave school to go to university. If we became an item, I suppose we could still meet up during the summer. I really like him (however, not sure if it's just infatuation or not!) but am not sure if he reciprocates that romantically. We're both going to read similar subjects at university. However, he's really fond of clubbing and getting drunk etc., which I've never really done. We are quite good friends but not in a normal close, confiding way. I'm scared to mention his homosexuality to him at all as I'm not sure how comfortable he is when other people mention it, even though he is not a gay virgin and his close friends do mention it occasionally. Plus he is horrible to me in a friendly way, if that makes sense. That might just be his personality but I quite like that, I think it's cute - although I'm not sure if he means it or not. I know I should just ask him as I might regret not doing so later, but I'm scared that his refusal will put a dampener on my last days at school. Also, my parents don't know I'm thinking this and they're perfectly clear that they will not allow any boyfriends home. So in a nutshell, am I ready/wise to ask him out, or should I wait and see if better guys are at university?
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So bascially, u two are foil and that's good thing for a perfect match.
"get close to them" and "ask them out" is just the same as getting to know more about somebody, dont try to stress over it.
U have only 2 weeks left so what would u lose. besides, if he accept, u will have the best moment ever.
Best of luck - :biggrin:
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Thanks for you advice; I really appreciate it. Some more questions: we are always exchanging sexual innuendo with each other just as a joke (we're both a bit immature!); do you think this would make light of a serious proposition? And if he accepts, do I have to organise dates etc. or can I leave it to him as he's had a boyfriend before and knows the ropes? I don't want to appear too possessive towards him. Or is it meant to be a joint effort? As you can probably tell, I haven't the slightest clue about how relationships work!
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u need to manage your life, dont let anyone take control it over u.
besides, for me, romantic is simply = childish + emotional + nature.
try to making these things happen at once and u will have ur answer.
good luck :biggrin:
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No, he's openly gay! I don't know what I want - in my opinion, relationships (especially the first one - I have never been in a relationship before) are all about cancelling things out rather than only finding Mr Right. I might like the clubbing; it's just that I've been brought up to be the epitome of innocence and have never tried it. But I've enjoyed the tame school discos! However, I have a hunch that there's a darker side to him - not a bad dark, just a side that he doesn't want anyone bar his closest friends to see ... should I see this as a challenge, or something to avoid? I mean, everyone has secrets!
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So are you suggesting that I should ask him out or not? You seem to imply at first that I should, then you tell me not to. Sorry, but I'm confused!
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Hi I would ask him out. He can only say yes or no. If he says yes you can both organize dates and places to go. You never know he could be the one.
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