04-19-2012, 03:06 AM
Hey everyone, I apologize for this being long
I basically had enough of the lack of communication in my family. I told my parents that we needed to talk and have a family discussion. This is something non-existent in my family and they didn't know how to respond to it. ( I imagine they were worked up about it all day)
When I arrived home, my father had come from work and was bombarding me with questions. He tends to be a very serious guy but today he was particularly antsy about what the discussion was going to be about. I was bombarded with over 100 questions until my mother arrived home. She didn't respond any differently.
So we got into the discussion and I basically started off on how mentioning about a family discussion in the morning made them crazy throughout the day. The fact that they become nervous about a small discussion leads me to believe that there is some underlying insecurity. Our lack of communication is what has bred ignorance and isolation in our family.
We discussed on improvements for communicating with one another and how we could spend time throughout the week or weekend as a family. We learned a lot from each other and it was nice to bounce feedback off one another. I did find out that throughout their childhood, my parents never had a strong bond with their parents nor did they feel like they received much of their love. I feel as though this is another reason why our family is lacking in communication or that strength. They seem to project the same emotions that they received as a child. So we agreed to make improvements.
My last point that I made was about my friend from High School who I had gone to Junior prom with. I bumped into her at the mall and we decided to catch up on how life's been. We discussed school, work, and her love life. When it came to my overview I hesitated when discussing my love life. That was because I had never been with a girl.
I then told my parents what I have been waiting to tell them for over 22 years. I mentioned to them that I had come out to my friend that day. "I'm gay"
There was a bit of an awkward silence due to shock. After that moment on they were very supportive of me. My mother's first words were "It's ok, just make sure you use protection" I couldn't help but giggle out of nervousness. I did get emotional through the process and felt very weak, to the point where I was shaking. I knew they were confused about it, but it would take them some time to adjust.
I am so relieved :biggrin: after this experience. I no longer have to suppress this part of me and instead I can embrace it. Hiding it has had a negative impact on my relationship with my family and I'm hoping we can make improvements.
This is a huge leap in progress, but much work is left to be done
Thank you everyone for giving me the courage to come out. You all are truly amazing mile:
I basically had enough of the lack of communication in my family. I told my parents that we needed to talk and have a family discussion. This is something non-existent in my family and they didn't know how to respond to it. ( I imagine they were worked up about it all day)
When I arrived home, my father had come from work and was bombarding me with questions. He tends to be a very serious guy but today he was particularly antsy about what the discussion was going to be about. I was bombarded with over 100 questions until my mother arrived home. She didn't respond any differently.
So we got into the discussion and I basically started off on how mentioning about a family discussion in the morning made them crazy throughout the day. The fact that they become nervous about a small discussion leads me to believe that there is some underlying insecurity. Our lack of communication is what has bred ignorance and isolation in our family.
We discussed on improvements for communicating with one another and how we could spend time throughout the week or weekend as a family. We learned a lot from each other and it was nice to bounce feedback off one another. I did find out that throughout their childhood, my parents never had a strong bond with their parents nor did they feel like they received much of their love. I feel as though this is another reason why our family is lacking in communication or that strength. They seem to project the same emotions that they received as a child. So we agreed to make improvements.
My last point that I made was about my friend from High School who I had gone to Junior prom with. I bumped into her at the mall and we decided to catch up on how life's been. We discussed school, work, and her love life. When it came to my overview I hesitated when discussing my love life. That was because I had never been with a girl.
I then told my parents what I have been waiting to tell them for over 22 years. I mentioned to them that I had come out to my friend that day. "I'm gay"
There was a bit of an awkward silence due to shock. After that moment on they were very supportive of me. My mother's first words were "It's ok, just make sure you use protection" I couldn't help but giggle out of nervousness. I did get emotional through the process and felt very weak, to the point where I was shaking. I knew they were confused about it, but it would take them some time to adjust.
I am so relieved :biggrin: after this experience. I no longer have to suppress this part of me and instead I can embrace it. Hiding it has had a negative impact on my relationship with my family and I'm hoping we can make improvements.
This is a huge leap in progress, but much work is left to be done
Thank you everyone for giving me the courage to come out. You all are truly amazing mile: