Thou Shall Not..

[trywait]

thou shall not bore me with laws that don't pertain to me

[Rainbowmum]

Thou shalt not put black electrical over your fathers remote for the T.V. I will give you one guess at how many batteries that man used.

[MisterTinkles]

thou shall not bore me with laws that don't pertain to me

Here ya go...

It is illegal to skateboard on walls “or other vertical surfaces” in Palo Alto.

Wearing a sweatshirt inside-out is deemed a “threatening misdemeanor” in Half-Moon Bay.

In 1930, the City Council of Ontario (California) passed an ordinance forbidding roosters to crow within the city limits.

In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.

In California, animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.

Peeling an orange in your hotel room is banned in California

San Francisco is said to be the only city in the nation to have ordinances guaranteeing sunshine to the masses.

In Cupertino, California, it is illegal to count backwards audibly in hexadecimal. According to Rick Kitson, Cupertino’s Public Communications Manager, this law is not true. “Amongst many lists of strange laws is an item about Cupertino. Usually, this strange law has something to do with a prohibition on audibly counting backwards in hexadecimal.

Redwood City has outlawed the frying of gravy.

In Santa Clara, it is forbidden to dedicate parking spaces to the patron saint of television.

Prostitutes in San Francisco are not obliged to make change for bills larger than $50.

The city of Mountain View proscribes calling pet fish by “names of aggressive content, e.g. ‘Biter’, ‘Killer’, ‘Sugar-Ray’”

Bicycles may not be ridden without “appropriate fashion accessories” anywhere in Santa Clara County (de facto law).

In Blythe, California, a person must own two cows in order to legally wear cowboy boots in public.

In Los Angeles, a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can’t be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife’s consent to beat her with a wider strap.

It is illegal to set a mousetrap without a hunting license.

Community leaders passed an ordinance that makes it illegal for anyone to try and stop a child from playfully jumping over puddles of water.

In L.A. it is against the law to complain through the mail that a hotel has cockroaches, even if it is true.

It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Blvd. at one time.

It is illegal to whistle for a lost canary before 7 am in Berkeley, CA.

In California, it is illegal to posses bear gall bladders.

In California, it is illegal to trip horses for entertainment.

a few more that maybe got missed above, maybe not

Women may not drive in a house coat.

No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants.

Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool (Baldwin Park).

You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows (Blythe).

It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds (Burlingame).

Detonating a nuclear device within the city limits results in a $500 fine (Chico).

It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time (Hollywood).

It is illegal to walk a camel down Palm Canyon Drive between the hours of four and six PM.

It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss (Pasadena).

Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house (Prunedale).

One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o’clock (Riverside).

Prohibits elephants from strolling down Market Street unless they are on a leash (San Francisco).

It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner (San Francisco).

It is illegal to wipe one’s car with used underwear (San Francisco).

[ChrisD]

Thou shall not bite my arm and hang on so as to leave a mark.
Thou shall not acquire 82 mosquito bites on your legs within the first 2 days of camp.
Neither shall thou follow me around like an ulcerous harpy of the Underworld and bombard me with pointless questions and senseless irritation.
Unless I actually like you, of course.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Though shalt not hold thy breath more than 8 minutes.

[MisterTinkles]

Though shalt not hold thy breath more than 8 minutes.

But what if you really, really, REALLY smell bad????

[Bowyn Aerrow]

^^pft. Then I guess you just have to break the law.

Thou shalt not break elven laws.

[Nick9]

Mr. T., thou shall not post posts like you have above, otherwise I may blurt I love you for that, and we don't want that to happen :p

[Rainbowmum]

Thou shalt not take give me wrong directions.

[trywait]

thou shall not get lost