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The amazing man I'm not attracted to
#1
I'm dating a really great guy he is extremely sweet, cute and smart. He has everything I want except I don't feel that chemistry that I want. It's that unexplainable feeling of butterflies and wanting to be with the person. I don't know what to do since we have dated for weeks but it doesn't seem to come yet I don't wanna mess up on a great guy.
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#2
Hi,
honestly you don't need it for a relationship to work and last long. The question is, how much do you miss it.
That fluttering feeling will go away after some time anyway. But when someone new comes and makes you feel it, will you run away from your bf?
You just need to be honest with yourself Smile
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#3
you say you don't wanna mess up on a great guy, i think thats a hint to what you want to do, i think you believe there is still hope, maybe you've got a lot on your mind currently ? Its a matter of do you feel happy when you're with him? if you do, then i say you should give it a chance. if not, after all this time, then i think its never gonna happen, the happiness or the chemistry.

good luck Wink
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#4
In my opinion if you aren't really interested about him you need to tell him that this can never truly lead to something. That way he doesn't get his hopes too high (If it isnt too late already).
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#5
I ran into that all the time as I had alot of opportunities...more than most I suppose as I worked in a gay nightclub for 20 years and pretty much got asked out every day. It wasn't long before I realized that if there was no chemistry DESPITE everything else in place...no dice.

Of course...people do mate for different reasons...some want security...some want to "look good" together (I think that is really barfy)...some want companionship and simple compatibility....some want hot sex and may not even like each other....

....I personally need the spark so if I didn't have that I moved along. I guess it all depends on what you personally need from a relationship because we area all different.
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#6
just be honest with the guy
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#7
I've been on the same boat.

It's weird, sometimes you meet a guy who has all the qualities you want in a guy, but for some reason there isn't that spark between the two of you.

All I can say is you can't force it if it's not there to begin with. Pellaz is right, just be honest with him and don't end up leading him on.

goodluck :]
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#8
One word : Communication
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