In and Out

[Jason74]

I came out of the closet when I was 22 years old and dated guys for 6 years and then after my bf cheated on me I went back in and I am sure that I posted my story before. Yet now I am working seasonal jobs and I tend to not really talk about my sexuality because I don't think its a very important part of my life and to talk about it. I have worked in 5 states in 2 years and am working near Yosemite NP now and for some reason I am feeling lonely and want to head to San Francisco and hook up with a guy because I am just in that phase right now.

Usually that phase passes and I am good, yet for some reason it took me to get out in the middle of nowhere to lust for a one timer or something like that. That is not the point of my posting and the point of my posting is that I just don't want to meet people for the first time and just say 'by the way my name is Jason and I am gay', that just doesn't sound right. I mean if someone would ask me about it I am most likely at the moment in my life again where I would just go ahead and tell them that I am gay, yet I am not going to bring it up.

Or if someone asks if I have a girlfriend or something like that. Anyway I am not even sure if this posting makes much sense. I have been working these seasonal jobs and for some reason I just want to be out rather than in the closet but I don't know a good way to do it without acting like I am looking for attention. I am heading to SF in June for Gay Pride and hope to have a good time while I am there. I haven't celebrated my pride in years

[dlboy53]

I think we all go in and out of the closet many time, especially when we get hurt. I think a lot of times is because we don't want to be hurt anymore..

I will say that your pic looks familial to me but not sure why.

[Rainbowmum]

Hi Jason ,
Welcome back , I do remember you.
First let me say , That I am so very sorry that you got cheated on.


Jason it's only natural to want to connect with someone, as humans we are a very social animal.
I really do not understand what your sexuality has to do with anyone but yourself, please do not let your sexuality define your life.

When you meet someone just be yourself.
More importantly accept and be true to yourself.

I am glad you are going to celebrate your pride , be proud of who you are, never forget that you are a wonderful, unique and worthy person.

We are all here for you.

[Watermark]

Sorry to hear that your bf cheated on you, Jason. Definately his loss!

I don't advertise my gayness either. If someone asks if im gay I wont deny it but if someone asks if I have gf or somthing like that I just say that I have partner.

I have funny story to share related to this. My last job!

One day I got phone call from Church near me - first I tought what in earth do they want... It turned out they needed someone to write them environmental diploma and they wanted me (gay male who isn't even memeber of church anymore) to do it for them. I said yes but later on I tought what the hell did I just do? They gona burn me if they find out that im gay and not even member of church. Anyhoo they didn't find out and and I was rather surprised how nice and down to earth (excluding priests) people working there were. During my last workday the curch financial director said that it feels like you have been here always and she was rather upset that I had to leave.

Talk about hiding Then again I didn't lie to them - was just darn lucky no one asked anything too deep about my personal life.

[Puck]

I'm so sorry you were cheated on....its not a pleasant feeling at all. Hope you're doing better mile:

I can agree with most on this thread. I don't hide my sexuality, but I don't flaunt it either. I'm just me, nothing more, nothing less.

The only time I've ever felt a need to "hide" that part of myself was during my high school days (went to a high school that was notorious for homophobic bigots) and I didn't particularly wish to be beaten to a pulp every day.

Aside from that, if anyone asks me anything personal, I don't lie, but I don't go out of my way to discuss my private life either.

[zeon]

Hello Jason,
You celebrate your sexuality everyday by being u mister... I would say head t sanfran and get a goods old rogering because we aint getting any younger and as long as YOU provide the johnnies your be fine... If they insist on BB say sorry No condom no screw no matter how damn attractive he is he might be a pink fluffy alien in disguise lol... Dont get too worked up over it however with regards to revealing being gay... Do what i do... Talk and mingle with people and eventually they ask if u ave a gf or bf and tell em truth...

[Jason74]

I have always come off very straight and just don't seem to have any manners in any sort of way that come off gay. I mean there is a guy where I work that just has the attitude where you can tell that he is gay but I haven't come out to him because I just don't think that we would have much in common and there is another guy that I think is but am just too nervous to just come out and ask. Its like my gaydar has never worked and it doesn't look like it will ever be fixed either.

Sometimes I think that the way I am and the way I act is the reason that I don't have more gay friends is because they think or assume that I might not really be gay and that I am questioning which of course is just bullshit. I don't know, I just wish that I had different manners or attitudes because then perhaps I wouldn't be in the situation that I am in now where I just wish people would guess, lol.

I feel like I am not being myself, yet when you meet anyone for the first time they don't say hi my name is Bob and I am straight, gay, tranny or etc. So its not that important. Yet its sometimes hard when a guy says look at the ass on that chick and in my head I am like she does have a nice ass but it really doesn't do anything like it is doing for the guy saying it. I am more like look at the ass on her boyfriend, yet there is no way in hell that I will ever say that, hell maybe I should.

[Si88]

That is not the point of my posting and the point of my posting is that I just don't want to meet people for the first time and just say 'by the way my name is Jason and I am gay', that just doesn't sound right. I mean if someone would ask me about it I am most likely at the moment in my life again where I would just go ahead and tell them that I am gay, yet I am not going to bring it up.

Being gay isn't all you are as a person, so I don't bring it up when meeting someone new. If asked I would tell them I am gay of course, but a straight person wouldn't go "hi I'm Joe and I'm straight" so being gay shouldn't neccessitate the need to do that either IMO.

[Si88]

I have always come off very straight and just don't seem to have any manners in any sort of way that come off gay. I mean there is a guy where I work that just has the attitude where you can tell that he is gay but I haven't come out to him because I just don't think that we would have much in common and there is another guy that I think is but am just too nervous to just come out and ask. Its like my gaydar has never worked and it doesn't look like it will ever be fixed either.

Sometimes I think that the way I am and the way I act is the reason that I don't have more gay friends is because they think or assume that I might not really be gay and that I am questioning which of course is just bullshit. I don't know, I just wish that I had different manners or attitudes because then perhaps I wouldn't be in the situation that I am in now where I just wish people would guess, lol.

I feel like I am not being myself, yet when you meet anyone for the first time they don't say hi my name is Bob and I am straight, gay, tranny or etc. So its not that important. Yet its sometimes hard when a guy says look at the ass on that chick and in my head I am like she does have a nice ass but it really doesn't do anything like it is doing for the guy saying it. I am more like look at the ass on her boyfriend, yet there is no way in hell that I will ever say that, hell maybe I should.

I am completely the same. I've come out to close mates so far, and they were shocked. I wish people would guess too, because it then does become difficult when a straight mate admires a woman in front of you. For a long time I have just played along because it was the much easier option.