Hello Everyone

[Jerbear1113]

Hello everyone I'm new to all of this. I'm here looking for some help and advice with my bi feeling that have come back and made life a little more difficult in the last year or so. This is my third marrage and really don't want to hurt her with doing something while she is still with me. I really want her to be happy, but I find it hard to be intimate with her all the time and really want to calm me feelings or move on with life. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm hopping to get help here to understand what to do next with life. I have read some of your posts and really feel that this is the right site to be a part of.

[pellaz]

we are the thinking animal. There is no reason why you cant achieve your objectives. dont over look couples classes. Gay straight or bi relationships are the same.

i have been through a lot, took my sweet time to do it. I would suggest you do the same. Be careful what step you take we all walk on a corn flake. Best not to jump up/dwn on it and expect it not to break.

welcome to gs and best wishes for success.

[Dan1980]

Hi welcome to the forum. I am sorry that your having problems with your bi feelings. I can understand that you don't want to hurt your wife but you have to think about your feelings as well. Such as where does your heart lay.

[chillout100]

Hello Everyone. New to this forum. I'm a gay man in a monogamous relationship with two step kids and two dogs. Look forward to chatting with some of you.

[chillout100]

Sorry to hear you are in such a dilemma. Until you're OK with yourself, it's not going to end. Maybe if you're honest to her about being Bi it will start the process of being honest with yourself and her. Only she can tell you if she's willing to accept the circumstance you're in and be ready for a "NO" but at least you'll know where to go from there.

[monk]

Welcome!

[Jerbear1113]

She was aware of my bi-sexual past before we got married. It has resurfaced in the last year. With my ex-wife it was never an issue because she would fulfill that need with by straping one on and taking care of it. Current wife just cannot get in to it. I really don't think it would be a problem if she took care of this desire but I can not force her to. When we first started to date I was not having any of these desires and now that is not so. I cannot seem to get it out of my head. I have been able to take care of it myself in the past but now I cannot. I don't want to hurt her by commiting adultry, don't want to live with these feeling always messing up my mind. Just plane lost

[pellaz]

... I cannot. I don't want to hurt her by committing adultery, don't want to live with ...

take it easy on the Adultery thing, it clouded the real reason. If you have un protected sex with another ( guy or gal ) you run the risk of infecting your wife. Even if you are ever so careful are you subjecting your wife to a 3% chance of getting the HIV or an STD? I find even a .0001% chance un exceptable

[matty7]

hi and welcome - sure plenty of members can offer wonderfull advice mate ,, enjoy GS and feel free to post

[Rainbowmum]

Hello Jerbear

I believe you when you say you do not want to hurt your wife.
Please don't take offense in what I am about to say .

When you feel good and are happy , it is easy to love another and bless them with your presence, you are willing to give them the best of you.
However if you are not happy , you will soon find yourself resenting your wife and viewing her as your captor .

This situation that you are finding yourself in , is not beneficial to any of you.
You can not project what you do not feel.
It is not fair to either of you , your wife deserves some that will love her unconditionally and with a whole heart.

You deserve to find happiness and be content.
Yearning can be very destructive if it is not answered.

We are all here for you , and none of us will judge you.
Take care.