Thank you all for the posts. I really dont know how to reply. All i know is thanks to you all I know I need to keep fighting. I probably will start talking to my roommate and his fiance about how I've been feeling, also I will start getting on here more before i get to this point again. As for the counseling I don't know the person I was going to was really Christian but he was professional he never pushed his faith on me. I might need to do some looking around in the Southern Oregon area to see what I can find. I am transferring to SOU so I will be out of this place I will be able to truly be able to find myself. For being a small town they have a good LGBT stance at the college.
Thank you all again for the replies. Every time I come to this forum it blows me out of the water how much love there is in the LGBT community.
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I am so sorry that you are having those feelings. I have never been suicidal myself, but i can understand what your going through. I will tell you as a full time EMT, i have ran suicidal calls in which i had to tell the mother and father that their child is dead. It breaks my heart that there was nothing i could do to save the person. I always feel some sense of guilt because i feel that if that person just had one person to talk them out of it. Its permanent brother, hang in there, it will get better, i promise
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Hello matey,
The best thing you can do is say bollocks to the lot you have left behind.. Why pretend to be hetrosexual if your not? Thats like putting ultimate Unleaded into your car and driving out with a ferrarri... It just wouldnt happen. The suicide thoughts you need to get a hold of and acknowleding them is a start... Yoiur not alone in thisd world and in life people come people go but those who go get replaced by better ones... Bit like a plant... As a seed it sheds its leaves and when it re grows them they are more stronger than the ones before.. You will find your place in society and your right seat and when you weigh up what you have in life ask yourself this....
Is it worth throwing everything you have achieved (acknowleding your sexuality is an achievement in itself) just to throw it away for someone else? I know personally... I wouldnt and im grateful i was born gay
Kindest regards and Hugz
Aunty Zeon x
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