I am confused

[iminus9]

Hi guys I am new here
Since I am new,I will introduce myself a bit here.
Even though it will be out of topic,sorry.
I'm 18 years old now,male chinese mix indonesian
I am sex addict too so I do it a couple times a day
I'm kinda confused about myself :/
So I got a story here.
When I was in 12 years old, I was staying up late and got nothing to do. So I turned on my TV in my bedroom and then I saw people chatting on TV (they send text to the TV station and it will shows up on the channel). Since I was bored, I sent my message to the TV station from a phone my mom gave me for emergency.
I said,

"I am alone and bored so please text me" on my message.

After my chat showed up on the screen, some people spam text-ed me and one of them don't. He was 27 years old. This guy is nice to me so I keep chatting with him. He acted so mature and made me feel like I finally have a dad. After a while, he asked me how old am I and what gender am I. I answered him that I am male and I am 12 years old. After I answered that question,he asked me things bout sex such as masturbation. I said I do know those stuff already.
Then he said,

"do you want to feel something better than masturbation?" .

I was really curious so I said yes,and then he told me to take a picture of my anal hole. I didn't really get why he told me to do that but I still did it. After I gave him few pictures, he said,

"give your middle finger some spit and try to get your finger inside your butt hole"

I ignored to do it because I thought it was dirty. then he said again,

"then you aren't going to know what it feels like"

Since I was too curious to know the pleasure he talked about, so I did try but it won't get in. I told him that and he said,

"It won't get in because you are not brave enough,it will be a little bit hurt but show your bravery to me please"

I can't refuse it because he said please. So I put more pressure on my middle finger and it went inside my hole all the way. I was feeling pain really hard. When I tried to pull it out, it was too much pain so I let my finger be there while I'm txting this guy that it's hurt. He told me to pull it fast and put more spit on my middle finger. When I pulled my finger, I almost cried from it. After I put a loads of spit on my middle finger, I did made it in and it was easier than the first time. I told him that it was easier that before and he told me to put my finger for a while so my anus muscle can get use to it. I didn't really get what he meant but I did. After a while, I pulled it out and put more spit as he told me. It went inside way faster and felt good. I kept doing it until I lost all my energy.
The next day he told me to do it again and again for 1 week. I was addicted to it and we planned to have sex but we couldn't because he was too far away from me. After that moment,he never text me again. I was after him everyday and keep telling him that I will try to find a way for us to have sex. I even sent him a picture but I didn't get any response. Since then, I keep playing with my hole while imagining him fucking me.

I did try to stop looking for men who want to fuck me, However it was a waste. I came back to it.

Now I am not really sure whether I am gay or not..

I don't like men because of their attitude,but I like them because they can fuck me over and over again like a slave. I do love girls too,but I don't really want to fuck girls.


So I can consider myself as gay/straight/bisexual ?
because I don't want to have boyfriend and girlfriend at the same time.

[mrk2010]

Right first of all if your story is real I'm going to say. Anal stimulation doesn't make you gay in its own so don't worry, although your sexual fantasies seem to have a gay theme. Only you can figure this out I'm afraid, you could just be going through a sexual phase and you may just be curious with the thrill of sleeping with a guy. But being gay or bisexual is so much more than one or a few sexual experiences, there is an emotional side to it and it some cases there can be a hell of a lot if souk search, in the end only you can decide :-) good luck.

[warmpixels]

Or, you can just not label yourself... gives your soul room to breathe and evolve like it's supposed to.

[myapple]

Or, you can just not label yourself... gives your soul room to breathe and evolve like it's supposed to.

Exactly! Don't label yourself. You are what you are.

[iminus9]

Right first of all if your story is real I'm going to say. Anal stimulation doesn't make you gay in its own so don't worry, although your sexual fantasies seem to have a gay theme. Only you can figure this out I'm afraid, you could just be going through a sexual phase and you may just be curious with the thrill of sleeping with a guy. But being gay or bisexual is so much more than one or a few sexual experiences, there is an emotional side to it and it some cases there can be a hell of a lot if souk search, in the end only you can decide :-) good luck.

Yes I'm not making this up
seems like a fantasy story but it isn't
thank you for your respond

Or, you can just not label yourself... gives your soul room to breathe and evolve like it's supposed to.

Exactly! Don't label yourself. You are what you are.

thank you,so now i know i am straight