A sonnet for Matt Shepard

[ManicReptile21]

Matthew Shepard,I wish you were still here.
There are many things that I want to say,
You stood against them; the sort that we fear.
It must be said, you opened up a way

Though, I wish that you never had to go.
Beaten thoroughly, left out in the cold;
They left you to rot in a painful woe.
Tied to a fence, left to stare at the wold.

Who knows what really conspired that night?
Perhaps you just wanted a connection.
To not feel alone, the warmth of some light;
A glimmer of love, A true confection.

Watch over me from the heavens, young prince.
They've looked at us differently; ever since.
---------------------------------------------------------

Last night I read a book titled, "The Laramie Project"
It was a play based off 200 interviews that were taken by the actual theatre company. I must say i was monumentally touched. In 1998 when Matt sheperd was beaten to death and left to rot on the fields of Wyoming, I was only in the third grade. 8 years old. Oblivious to the disgusting and merciless world around me. Sure people say that it was decades ago, but I realized something. I have never majorly read up on things like this. They always scared me. The truth has always frightened me. But lately I've been reading so many book about gay society and such because I genuinely want to know more about people like me. But has the gay society only made progress through the death of our kind? I mean when several kids commited suicide they had the wear purple day i believe. Why does someone have to die? Why do we have to be at the mercy of the straight; at the mercy of their sympathy? Doesn't something sound extremely wrong with that? MAybe i'm just missing it because i am secretly really upset after having read this play. I want to read more about it but a part of me is shaken. I don't get easily shaken. I am a fan of blood and gore. But this----this wasn't human.

[pellaz]

[Sylph]

Lewis... Just when I thought I had you figured out, you went all deep on me :eek: .

This is really profound Lewis... I wish I could write poetic literature this way. I never really took an extreme interest in it in school [much to my AP english teachers dismay].

It's really nice that you thought to do this. There's always that one person, no matter where you go or where you are, that always thinks of something everyone forgets.

Though I can't say for sure, Matthew would've probably been happy if not flattered by this. I know I was and it wasn't even for me!

Very nice Mr.Lewis.

Perhaps it shouldn't be Manic in front of your name but, Poetic :biggrin:

PoeticLewis is your new name :tongue:

[Pix]

Unfortunately his death isn't unique or even all that rare, but for some reason it caught the attention of the nation.

Even before I realized I was gay (though I had had sex with girls by then, I just didn't put that much thought into it) I couldn't help but see the violence done to gays in Texas. And not just kids in school who feared the label because of the shunning, shaming, and even violent abuse it could bring but even in the gay area of Houston (which is pretty cosmopolitan) I actually witnessed genuine hate crimes. The first dead person I saw in my life (and I hadn't even been to a funeral yet) was one being wrapped up (another was already wrapped up) of apparently 2 men who got shot in the head as they left a gay bar and that image is burned into my brain.

One guy I was fond of back then was a really feminine gay guy that we called Sissy. He didn't look gay or flaming (though he was small and skinny) but he had the walk & talk that shouted he was gay and he was one of the sweetest men I ever knew. He'd ended up dating a boy in our krew of mostly runaway kids (the boy being 18 by then) who had severe challenges from extreme abuse (including brain damage & head scars from where his father had apparently beat him in the head with the chain of a chainsaw) and his sweetness was such that even though we were wary of adults at best we fully accepted him, in part because he made that brain damaged boy so happy (he'd been miserable before Sissy). Not only did we come to accept him but as he walked away from us (in the middle of the day) a guy came by and didn't see that Sissy was counted as one of us and just hauled off and punched him to the ground. The gay basher was shocked when we reacted and the boys started to rush him but Sissy, ever the sweet guy, got up and and stopped our krew from returning the favor with, "No, no, he's MINE!" Then he turned and swished as he said in the gayest way (voice, hands on waving hips, etc) possible, "Honey, your ass is mine!" He was so gay as he said it that we all started laughing, one of the guys who had been about to beat that gay basher actually fell to the ground laughing so hard and the gay basher took off...and I knew that was what Sissy wanted, he didn't want to see anymore violence or trouble, but even though I laughed then to I was bothered by how he wasn't surprised at all by a complete stranger punching him out of the blue like that.

Of course since being gay myself I've seen a lot more hatred, and know other victims of it. One man told me he or one of those he knew would kill me as the Bible commanded now that he and his friends had my license plate (actually it was my girlfriend's jeep, but still).

And most recently:

http://abcnews.go.com/US/lesbian-teen-co...d=16652447

Police in Texas are searching for an assailant who targeted a lesbian couple in a close-range shooting that left one woman dead and the other in the hospital, however authorities said it is not being investigated as a hate crime

"Last Friday, as millions of LGBT people and their allies were celebrating Pride, something awful happened in Portland, Texas. We need to respond publicly to this tragedy," he wrote. "Whoever shot Mary Christine Chapa and Mollie Judith Olgin, whatever the motive, regardless of where it happened, two beautiful girls were shot and one was killed. We need to honor the memory of Mollie and pray for the recovery of Mary."

And even when Matthew Shepard was killed I don't think it was a big deal right away. I say that because Westboro Baptist crashed the funeral with signs saying he was in Hell now and no one seemed to care (of course no one really cared about them until they started thanking God for 9/11 and dead soldiers as well as dead gays, and some believe that's why Westboro changed as they weren't getting enough attention as ordinary if especially obnoxious Bible gay bashers like so many others).

[ManicReptile21]

Lewis... Just when I thought I had you figured out, you went all deep on me :eek: .

This is really profound Lewis... I wish I could write poetic literature this way. I never really took an extreme interest in it in school [much to my AP english teachers dismay].

It's really nice that you thought to do this. There's always that one person, no matter where you go or where you are, that always thinks of something everyone forgets.

Though I can't say for sure, Matthew would've probably been happy if not flattered by this. I know I was and it wasn't even for me!

Very nice Mr.Lewis.

Perhaps it shouldn't be Manic in front of your name but, Poetic :biggrin:

PoeticLewis is your new name :tongue:

Thanks. I actually had no idea about him until I read the play. It's upsetting; it really is. I decided to read the book his mother wrote about him; i'm be done with it by the end of the night. I think i'm finding an interesting speck of myself in his memory. I always avoid these topics in school because i was afraid to look at the reality I would have to fave sooner or later. I wish i hadn't I wish i could've told my classmates about this guy. I wish i could've told them alot of things. I feel like i dishonored him. So i wrote him that sonnet. I hopes that maybe he will let me forgive myself for always turning a blind eye in his direction.

[ManicReptile21]

Unfortunately his death isn't unique or even all that rare, but for some reason it caught the attention of the nation.

Even before I realized I was gay (though I had had sex with girls by then, I just didn't put that much thought into it) I couldn't help but see the violence done to gays in Texas. And not just kids in school who feared the label because of the shunning, shaming, and even violent abuse it could bring but even in the gay area of Houston (which is pretty cosmopolitan) I actually witnessed genuine hate crimes. The first dead person I saw in my life (and I hadn't even been to a funeral yet) was one being wrapped up (another was already wrapped up) of apparently 2 men who got shot in the head as they left a gay bar and that image is burned into my brain.

One guy I was fond of back then was a really feminine gay guy that we called Sissy. He didn't look gay or flaming (though he was small and skinny) but he had the walk & talk that shouted he was gay and he was one of the sweetest men I ever knew. He'd ended up dating a boy in our krew of mostly runaway kids (the boy being 18 by then) who had severe challenges from extreme abuse (including brain damage & head scars from where his father had apparently beat him in the head with the chain of a chainsaw) and his sweetness was such that even though we were wary of adults at best we fully accepted him, in part because he made that brain damaged boy so happy (he'd been miserable before Sissy). Not only did we come to accept him but as he walked away from us (in the middle of the day) a guy came by and didn't see that Sissy was counted as one of us and just hauled off and punched him to the ground. The gay basher was shocked when we reacted and the boys started to rush him but Sissy, ever the sweet guy, got up and and stopped our krew from returning the favor with, "No, no, he's MINE!" Then he turned and swished as he said in the gayest way (voice, hands on waving hips, etc) possible, "Honey, your ass is mine!" He was so gay as he said it that we all started laughing, one of the guys who had been about to beat that gay basher actually fell to the ground laughing so hard and the gay basher took off...and I knew that was what Sissy wanted, he didn't want to see anymore violence or trouble, but even though I laughed then to I was bothered by how he wasn't surprised at all by a complete stranger punching him out of the blue like that.

Of course since being gay myself I've seen a lot more hatred, and know other victims of it. One man told me he or one of those he knew would kill me as the Bible commanded now that he and his friends had my license plate (actually it was my girlfriend's jeep, but still).

And most recently:

http://abcnews.go.com/US/lesbian-teen-co...d=16652447





And even when Matthew Shepard was killed I don't think it was a big deal right away. I say that because Westboro Baptist crashed the funeral with signs saying he was in Hell now and no one seemed to care (of course no one really cared about them until they started thanking God for 9/11 and dead soldiers as well as dead gays, and some believe that's why Westboro changed as they weren't getting enough attention as ordinary if especially obnoxious Bible gay bashers like so many others).

I'm sorry about your experiance. I never once took the time out to sort out how bashers worked. Homophobia never really had an effect on me; maybe it's because i blend in so well. It's plastered everywhere i go. I was being ignorant. I didn't want to read up about any of it. I'm ashamed of myself.

[dfiant]

Iremeber this as if it happened yesterday. It was news in Australia at the time. It was labelled a 'hate crime' but very little was mention in our media about it being a 'gay' hate crime. You had to dig a little deeper to discover the true story.

I haven't read Laramie Project, but I have seen the movie based on the book. Very moving.

[ManicReptile21]

Iremeber this as if it happened yesterday. It was news in Australia at the time. It was labelled a 'hate crime' but very little was mention in our media about it being a 'gay' hate crime. You had to dig a little deeper to discover the true story.

I haven't read Laramie Project, but I have seen the movie based on the book. Very moving.

I had never heard a signle thing about it. I was searching through my libraries books on gay culture and whatnot and i ran into this. The first gay bashing event i have ever actually read about. It was an eye opener. A bloody and heavy eye opener.

[Rainbowmum]

So very tragic , you did good Lewis, proud of you.

It never ceases to amaze me how much the press will cover up.
Over here ,there were many murders at Bondi , that the police turned a blind eye to, it was not until a gay news reader from Wollongong that was murdered that they did anything about it.

Sadly Bondi was not the only place that this happened at.
Lovechild hill at Landsvale ,very famous for gay bashing, the police did nothing about it .
Newcastle Make out lane same thing , police did nothing about it.

Tragic .

[ttec4u]

Hi Lewis...... great write. I remember this incident.. violent crimes to me are always shocking. I can't even imagine harming someone .. except in a life or death situation. In my defense or the defense of someone else. And hate crimes are even harder to comprehend. Gay society hasn't really been accepted all that long. (And still isn't by some)
In 1952, The British Government chemically castrated Alan Turing because he was found “guilty” of being a homosexual. The amount of good Alan Turing’s work did is probably immeasurable. By helping to decode the German’s plans, he turned the war in the Allies favor and saved many lives. As a mathematician, logician, cryptanalyst, and computer scientist, Alan Turing’s work was foundational to the development of modern computing.
In 1954, Alan Turing supposedly committed suicide, eating an apple laced with cyanide. The symbolism of eating an apple, an archetypal symbol of seeking the knowledge of good and evil, should not be missed, whether or not it was intended.
Hang in there.. there's strength in numbers.