I should just get morbidly obese and get a herd of cats to live in my apartment. And tell people I've got some Hot Pockets in the oven and ask for all the ham at the deli counter. Fuck going to gym and trying to maintain appearances and half-assing my social life. Yeah. I should just let it all go on coke and Hot Pocket binges. That's the way to go out. Like James Dean, if he were fat and a coke head.
Do you mind explaining what happened? I can gather that you went on a date and didn't hit it off.
You definately shouldn't slave yourself over your appearence for others- only do it for yourself. Same with your social life- if you'd rather hang with friends instead of go on dates, then hang with friends and stuff.
I actually wanted to delete this post, lol. It's a bit self-pitying, isn't it? But it's how I felt at the time.
Yes, it was about a date that didn't quite go as well as I had hoped. It was one of those nice dates with a nice guy where mid-way through we both knew we would never talk or see each other again.
But I've realized something: I've been dating the same guy (not literally but in a figurative sense) over and over and over again, expecting a different result. To many people, that's the very definition of insanity.
I know this is controversial, and some of you guys will criticize this part, but I've noticed that when a guy is 1) white, 2) college-educated (particularly with a masters or higher), 3) liberal/progressive in political stance, 4) middle/upper-middle class, 5) between the ages of 25-35, the chances of me having chemistry with a a guy go way down.
Yes, I understand the irony as I match most of the items in that list. And wouldn't want to date someone whose political stances or age vary widely from my own. It's just a list I compiled one night while thinking of why so many of my dates go nowhere.
I know many wind up with partners who are like themselves, but at this point I can't see myself with a stuffy shirt-and-tie professional, a doctor or a lawyer, you know. I have a Latino friend who doesn't have a regular day job (he teaches yoga occasionally and freelances as an interior designer), is raising pet chickens, and doesn't have a college degree but is quite intelligent and knowledgable about a number of subjects. He's genuinely one of the coolest, most unique people I know, but he sometimes gets nervous going to gay bars without his partner (a white doctor about 10 years older than he is) because he feels he won't fit in b/c he doesn't have that college degree, etc. It kinda befuddles me because I think he stands out in such a beautifully positive way.
I'd like to see what kind of chemistry I'd have with a cute Asian guy who's a graphic designer and into, I dunno, obscure horror/art/animated films, for example. I'd think I'd have a unique chemistry with such a person.
Drew Wrote:I know this is controversial, and some of you guys will criticize this part, but I've noticed that when a guy is 1) white, 2) college-educated (particularly with a masters or higher), 3) liberal/progressive in political stance, 4) middle/upper-middle class, 5) between the ages of 25-35, the chances of me having chemistry with a a guy go way down.
Drew.
Love is a mystery.
I look at your criteria and, interestingly enough (to me), it's essentially what I WAS looking for. But I found someone slightly different in every respect except the age.
Never woulda guessed it. But love is where you find it. You're right to open yourself up to different "demographics".
Best of luck.
P.S, I found the longer you wait, the sweeter it is.
Drew Wrote:I know this is controversial, and some of you guys will criticize this part, but I've noticed that when a guy is 1) white, 2) college-educated (particularly with a masters or higher), 3) liberal/progressive in political stance, 4) middle/upper-middle class, 5) between the ages of 25-35, the chances of me having chemistry with a a guy go way down.
The reason is because people like that tend to think they're the majority and that they're hot stuff and "what everyone should be like". And they usually only go for guys who are everything on that checklist. They think they're so great that they can afford to be picky.
I'm kinda picky right now too, but, I'm young so maybe I'll open up eventually (or become desperate). The only one of those I fit is white, I guess.
Also, there's higher than a master's? o_O Most people I know won't go past bachelor's.
WheresTheLove Wrote:Also, there's higher than a master's? o_O Most people I know won't go past bachelor's.
Uh, doctoral degrees. I have one in pharmacy. It might be because I live in the heart of Yale, but I know a lot of people who are either doctoral candidates or have received them.
Personally, it doesn't mean squat whether my partner even has a bachelors or not. I'd rather he and I have personal chemistry, not a degree in the field of.
Absolutely positively NO jealousy...I cannot handle it.
If you speed and endanger other people while you are driving I think you have no respect for other people and their right to live...so you will have no respect for me and think that what you want to do trumps everything else.
If you ridicule other people's looks or hair or clothes I will run the other way fast...
Don't even attempt to control my mind...I don't even do it.
be the practical gay; what do you need to complete your life you are missing. Can be a physical thing, can be a knowledge thing but i bet if the boy had a smile, a back rub when you needed it... What is this chemistry thing
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
