Gay Agnostic in a Christian Family

[JisthenewK]

I'm 16, gay, and agnostic. My mom is a HUGE Bible-Basher and accepts my homosexuality, but does not yet know I am agnostic. She doesn't agree with me being gay, but she loves me anyway. She has told me before that if I convert from Christianity, she will constantly try to convert me back! What do I do? I'm happier being agnostic.:confused:

[Pix]

Does she make you go to church or something?

If not then I don't know why you can't let her think you're Christian. She may think that if you're not Christian that she'll be without you for eternity while you'll suffer eternally and that's not a thought she can stand, so it might be kinder to just let her think you're "saved" if it's not too much trouble.

Of course if you gotta "be you" and make sure she knows it then just try to think which is more annoying: nodding whenever she praises Jesus or quotes the Bible (maybe you could make a game of it, like with your own bingo cards of her favorite verses and Biblical names/books, and bonus points for not sighing or rolling your eyes! :tongue: ), or her trying to convert you back, and pick the lesser evil. (Note, if you're in the US then she can legally have you abducted and put into an abusive Christian home--possibly in another country--to brainwash you, and they can make you believe, I had a friend who was brainwashed by one when she was 16 who came out believing I was in a satanic cult. You'll probably say your mom would never do that, but thing is most parents have no idea how abusive these places are, and you should also ask yourself, would she let you burn eternally when that possibility is all too real to her?)

If she does insist on church attendance you might try going to a UU church. Some Christians are fine with this (and your mom being ok with you being gay is a good sign that she's one who would accept this) while others are not (Texas even tried to have the UUs revoked as an official religion at the state level). They include different religions (including Christians, but also Hindus and even Wiccans) so they don't seem to spend a lot of time on religion but rather some broad ideas about God/dess that should be much easier for an agnostic to put up with (as an added bonus they're officially gay friendly).

[pellaz]

agnostic is not a religion, your saying just dont care.

[JisthenewK]

We don't go to Church, but she constantly listens to Church radio stations and tries to get me to "be more like the people that preach in them." It's annoying. She thinks I've lost my faith (which I'm agnostic now, so I guess she's right in a sense). Anyway, it's really getting on my nerves. I think my brother is agnostic or atheist (he never admits to it, but I know he is). I just don't know what to do. It's my right to be agnostic, isn't it?

[TryingNewThing]

wait 2 more years, then move out of her house, problem solved

never argue with anyone about religion or politics, it's like trying to convince someone their baby isn't cute.

[Pix]

At 16 you don't have many rights. In some ways even prisoners in maximum security prisons have more rights than you.

I think you're perfectly right to be whatever you want to be. But just because it's ok doesn't mean the law of the land is going to let you do it (as my granny said, "Sometimes justice is on the other side of the law"). And until you're 18 it pays to be extra cautious because the things your mom can have done to you (and which will be suggested by many ministries she probably listens to) is as legal as it is horrifying (genuine torture, starvation, beatings, putting you in bindings to administer electroshock or playing Bible verses at you, "buddies" in which kids rat each other out for rule breaking and even "thought crimes" or face the same punishment, etc). I recall reading of one teen that escaped the gulag his parents sent him to in another country (after the owners fled the USA for kids not surviving the program and IIRC he couldn't even legally accept native kids, only US kids) and he escaped to make it back by boat without eating for days and going to the authorities once back in the USA to report the horrendous abuse he endured and the courts sent him back because his parents wanted him there. Most other civilized countries (in adhering to the UNCRC) have made these places illegal, but not the USA. :frown:

I'm agnostic myself and I know those religious stations get on my nerves to (though once in a blue moon I can find them entertaining, like when a caller described to the DJ of KLOVE I think it was on how God literally told him a recipe for chocolate milk that his children loved and the DJ answering "praise Jesus" or some such which made me laugh as I wondered if the DJ believed that drivel or was just playing along to keep his job). You have my sympathy, but sometimes it's best (and safer) to just let others think what they want about you, especially if you're not yet 18. Do you have somewhere else you can go to to get away from your mom so you're not as exposed to that so much?

[pellaz]

tell her you need a job and or college first.
i dont know what rights a teen age person has? a lot if she loves you.

[JisthenewK]

My close friends know. I just feel really weird about it now. I guess I'll have to wait until I'm 18.

[dfiant]

agnostic is not a religion, your saying just dont care.

That's not entirely true. Agnosts neither believe nor disbelieve there is a deity. Agnost believe there is not enough evidence to prove one way or another, but are open minded to both arguements. So it is no where near saying 'I don't care', it is more like saying 'Prove it'

Athiest and theists disbelieve and believe the existance of a deity.

None of these are a relgion in itself, but all of them are a long way from not caring.

[pellaz]

... Agnost believe there is not enough evidence to prove one way or another, but are open minded to both arguments.
Atheist and theists disbelieve and believe the existence of a deity.

so what is in between your agnostic and atheist
or does the OP care? think he is hoping it just goes away
not enough information.