08-02-2012, 08:19 PM
Last night I had what was possibly the most terrifying dream I have ever experienced:
I was at a house party, celebrating someone's birthday. As the night progressed it became raucous, but harmlessly so. I began to notice I was becoming increasingly dizzy; the scene around me seemed suddenly exacerbated, threatening, fuzzy. I mentioned to a friend that I wasn't feeling quite right. Amused, they remarked that I must've been drinking a little too hard.
The feeling worsened; soon I was stumbling, mumbling in panic, trying desperately to focus on a room that rippled around me like fluid.
I realized that I must've been roofied- or perhaps even poisoned.
I appealed to those around me for help; they were only entertained- convinced I was playing the dramatic drunk.
Finally someone came to my aid: asking what I had drunk and who had given it to me- I suddenly became aware that I hadn't drunk a thing.
I became hysterical; choking on guttural screams which flooded up and out of my throat like vomit. I hit the floor.
the party crowded around me- frozen with confusion.
I shook violently; clawing at my arms and legs; crying, screaming, blinded.
I was completely incapable of calming myself; of pacifying this internal state which my mind seemed to have induced of its very own accord.
This was psychosis.
I had lost control of my mind; of my ability to process reality; of my body. I was crazy.
The dream then became lucid, and as I slowly transitioned back into the realm of consciousness I found myself praying with all my might that I would wake up sane.
I've dreamt of dying; of becoming deformed and incapacitated, of the loss of limb and physical function- but never before of the loss of my own mind.
The human brain possesses such phenomenal power; but I would never have thought it possessed the ability to simulate the experience of its very own destruction.
I would love to know if anyone else has ever experienced this sort of thing in life or a dream?
I'm almost a little worried that this may in fact be the onset of insanity (insufferable much?).
I was at a house party, celebrating someone's birthday. As the night progressed it became raucous, but harmlessly so. I began to notice I was becoming increasingly dizzy; the scene around me seemed suddenly exacerbated, threatening, fuzzy. I mentioned to a friend that I wasn't feeling quite right. Amused, they remarked that I must've been drinking a little too hard.
The feeling worsened; soon I was stumbling, mumbling in panic, trying desperately to focus on a room that rippled around me like fluid.
I realized that I must've been roofied- or perhaps even poisoned.
I appealed to those around me for help; they were only entertained- convinced I was playing the dramatic drunk.
Finally someone came to my aid: asking what I had drunk and who had given it to me- I suddenly became aware that I hadn't drunk a thing.
I became hysterical; choking on guttural screams which flooded up and out of my throat like vomit. I hit the floor.
the party crowded around me- frozen with confusion.
I shook violently; clawing at my arms and legs; crying, screaming, blinded.
I was completely incapable of calming myself; of pacifying this internal state which my mind seemed to have induced of its very own accord.
This was psychosis.
I had lost control of my mind; of my ability to process reality; of my body. I was crazy.
The dream then became lucid, and as I slowly transitioned back into the realm of consciousness I found myself praying with all my might that I would wake up sane.
I've dreamt of dying; of becoming deformed and incapacitated, of the loss of limb and physical function- but never before of the loss of my own mind.
The human brain possesses such phenomenal power; but I would never have thought it possessed the ability to simulate the experience of its very own destruction.
I would love to know if anyone else has ever experienced this sort of thing in life or a dream?
I'm almost a little worried that this may in fact be the onset of insanity (insufferable much?).