help!

[kookooz]

guys haven't u got up some new ideas? i'm desprt here!! i'm back home and i see them a lot i can't handle it anymore!!

[marshlander]

Despite Enigma's comments I'm not quite sure what's going on here. You are "desperate", but you don't sound desperate enough to put yourself to any inconvenience to get what you want ... ? I apologise for being so blunt, but shouldn't you get out a bit more? Being on your own and brooding over this clearly isn't helping!

Okay, how about a Calendar Girls thing, then; everyone seems to be doing them at the moment. As it happens I'm quite looking forward to visiting a school where I know the all female staff have a calendar of buff firemen on the toilet wall! Get all your mates together to produce a naked calendar for 2009. You could develop a passionate interest in supporting your local dogs' home or some other worthy charity to which you can donate all the profits of your sales.

[princealbertofb]

Kookooz, you need to get OUT of that closet NOW!!! You are not being realistic about straight guys showing you their goods when they'd rather be showing them to the ladies. What on earth makes you think that they'd unzip for you? Especially as none of them are aware (so you say) that you are gay. They might do it just to tease you if they knew, or even if they didn't know, but no one unzips that easily unless they have a motive. I certainly don't understand YOUR motivation. As a suggestion to end part of your frustration, you could always try taking pictures of their faces and sticking them on a photograph of a naked porn star as some people do with famous people, but somehow I doubt that it would work for you.
What is it exactly that you are trying to accomplish by seeing them naked? I don't get it. It just sounds very obsessive and that's not really cool. Would it be a way for you to solve a big mystery, or to compare what YOU've got with their tackle? Or would it relieve your... erm... stress or sexual tension?

[kookooz]

ok guys i know u all think i'm a freak now!! but i realized that all i have to do i stick to porn :S
i can never get out cloest my friends and family hate gay guys i know for sure i'm sorry for bothering guys really it's just that god always make me meet new hot unfortunatly straight guys hehe all my friends are hot :'(
that's all u know it's really hard to live with all those studs around u!! thanks for ur support guys and sorry again

[princealbertofb]

ok guys i know u all think i'm a freak now!! but i realized that all i have to do i stick to porn :S
i can never get out cloest my friends and family hate gay guys i know for sure i'm sorry for bothering guys really it's just that god always make me meet new hot unfortunatly straight guys hehe all my friends are hot :'(
that's all u know it's really hard to live with all those studs around u!! thanks for ur support guys and sorry again

Don't apologise! It doesn't really matter. We can understand that it's one of your fantasies. But are you sure your family and friends ALL hate gay guys? You might be surprised.
You need to start practising telling someone you trust (maybe a woman friend?) about your doubts about your sexuality, then maybe you'll realise that people say things about gays but don't necessarily quite believe what they say. It's always different when they realise that one of their friends is gay. "Oh, if he's gay, and he's my friend, then I need to rethink my views on gays." But they won't show you their package, I'm afraid. :frown:

[princealbertofb]

ok guys i know u all think i'm a freak now!! but i realized that all i have to do i stick to porn :S
i can never get out cloest my friends and family hate gay guys i know for sure i'm sorry for bothering guys really it's just that god always make me meet new hot unfortunatly straight guys hehe all my friends are hot :'(
that's all u know it's really hard to live with all those studs around u!! thanks for ur support guys and sorry again

By the way, Kookooz, how old are you? It might make a difference in our approach to the problem if we knew. :confused:

[kookooz]

i'm 19 and yeah i'm pretty sure they hate gays when they knew one of the students at the college is gay they swor they called names and they did really really bad stuff specially that my parents are religius so oh btw i'm not a believer and i live in an arab country my mum is american my dad is lebanese but he's a muslim and u know it's forbidden!! now here's my situation frankly i guess i'm living in hell ha?

[princealbertofb]

Your profile says you're in Milan, which, to my knowledge is in Italy. So we had no idea that you lived in an Arab country. Now that that is made clear, it does make the situation a bit seem more difficult. I couldn't understand that Italians were so against gays. You are in an unfortunate predicament, it seems, but I hear and have read that Arab countries also have their gay communities. There must be ways in which to hook up with like minded young men, but again maybe you live in a small community, which can make things really awkward. How does your American-born mother look upon gays? Too religious to accept it? Tell us a bit more of your circumstances. When you discovered you were gay? How you manage to hide it? What makes you think you're gay? etc...

[kookooz]

ok here's the sittuation my mum is homophobic she's not religious but i know she hates gays
i know i'm gay for sure anyways i just keep it as a secret no one knows i mean no one! so porn is all i got for the sexual issues and forums like this for u know friends and community issues!! so this is my sittuation
oh and i've got a lot of hot hot hot male friends!! hehe so this is my missrable life!!

[marshlander]

Given that you have now shared more information I apologise for my previous sharp response.

I have never been to Lebanon, so I have no experience to offer. Looking at websites such as Gay Lebanon and its linked sites http://www.gaylebanon.info/affiliates.html
it would seem that the one idea would be to head for Beirut when you are old enough. It happens in the UK too. Many young gay people leave home and find they feel more comfortable in larger cities. Until then it looks like you are condemned to making your own networks in what appears to be a hostile environment.

Given the general antipathy towards gay people I would still suggest (only more respectfully this time ) that you find some displacement activity for your obsession with your friends' bodies. No way is it going to be easy, but it will probably be a lot safer. It sounds as though any gay friendships and relationships you develop will have to be conducted under conditions most of us would find unbearable, but if Beirut still has its gay bars there is obviously hope that life out there.

The world wide web is a great way of finding out about the rest of the world. The downside is that it can increase our dissatisfaction with the life we have. However, things have changed so quickly in so many parts of the world in recent years I would like to think there is hope for all. Naive, probably, but the alternative to hope is despair.

While you are under your parents’ roof you will probably have to show some respect for the rules, but there will come a time before too long when you will be able to travel … perhaps even to Milan (yes, that reference puzzled me too).

A final thought. May I reinforce what has been mentioned about attitudes changing when someone in the family is known to be gay. It does happen. Hopefully, even in a predominantly Muslim or Christian society, family blood ties find a way to overcome prejudice and fear.

Regards and good luck