were you spanked as a kids?

[koridallos]

"well....mostly." Isn't the same as ok. There is a difference.

[koridallos]

Yes, that was back in the days when you were actually allowed to discipline children without legal retorts of abuse.

Most people in my generation and before were spanked and were respectful of elders and authority, now a days the only people kids respect is themselves...Generation ME.

I Know many adults who are generation ME. Older than 50 that is. Why do you blame everything on kids specifically? Don't kids follow the examples of their elders.? If their elders are drug addicts or Me, myself, and I, How do you expect better children? Think about it.

I am not passing any judgement here. And I am sorry if you feel that way. But why are people blaming everything on kids. As if we adults, have nothing to do with this chaotic society we have created?

[Watermark]

Yes I was once and I deserved it. Dont have own kids so no to that I supose.

[Zennyboy]

I didnt get spanked, i did get the belt though

[dfiant]

Don't kids follow the examples of their elders

Not as much as they used to. TV, video games, music are (And have been for a long time) the preferred role models and a lot of kids do not respect parents ( I say a lot because even 1 child is A LOT). Parents are afraid to discipline their unruley children because of a couple of reasons. The fear of been charged for child abuse, and the fear of losing their 12 year old because that child 'has rights'.

While I believe there had to be a move away from the beatings of children under the guise of 'discipline', the pendulum has swung way to far in the favour of the child and some countries pamper children more than others. In Australia, Centrelink (Social Security) is far too accessible to youth as young as 14. Society has become 'You don't like your parents? Not old enough for a job. Well we'll give you some rent money and extra money to do whatever you like so you can get away from your parents that expect only what is best for you and your future. So come and join us in the 'VICIOUS CYCLE' where we will give you everything and teach you NOTHING.'

If their elders are drug addicts or Me, myself, and I, How do you expect better children?

The lost art of discipline and respect. MOST people over 40 learned it, but that is where the decline in discipline and respect started, 'If you don't want to do it, you don't have to do it'

Think about it.

That will be 5 seconds of my life I won't get back

[Marc]

I got the odd slap from my parents, it didn't do me any harm.

I think discipline is a very good thing, aslong as it doesn't go to far.

A lot of todays social problems are down to the lack of discipline.

[Blue]

I'm sorry, I know i might get alot of dislikes by saying this.

But there is really no need for a thread like this.

Actually maybe there needs to be more threads like this, only not just about spanking. maybe those of us that endured the horrors humans are capable of inflicting on each other need to stop hiding in the shadows, stop covering up for "THEM" and, raise out hand and say- "Yes, I am a survivor and, I'm proud of myself for making out alive."

Maybe then society would stop trying to sweep it under the rug, stop telling us it wasn't that bad, to just get over it, forget it, or worse, telling us it didn't happen.

Just maybe it's time the world took of those rose colored glasses.

[Pix]

I Know many adults who are generation ME. Older than 50 that is. Why do you blame everything on kids specifically? Don't kids follow the examples of their elders.? If their elders are drug addicts or Me, myself, and I, How do you expect better children? Think about it.

I am not passing any judgement here. And I am sorry if you feel that way. But why are people blaming everything on kids. As if we adults, have nothing to do with this chaotic society we have created?

That's been my observation. For example, if parents have poor impulse control and cuss a lot then so do their kids...no matter how much they discipline them for it (at most such parents can change their behavior while in their presence only). But parents who are considerate and mature tend to have kids who act the same way. Of course exceptions exist both ways, but generally speaking a parental example has far more affect than if one chooses to use corporal punishment or not (by this I mean that only causes discomfort and not risk real injury as most spankings & whippings qualify as, and likewise isn't someone who reaches for the belt just because s/he was having a bad day and wants to take it out on someone in their power which is more bullying than discipline, and if it strays from these parameters then I consider it abuse that is damaging to a child's development, though even so the example is still the strongest, so an alcoholic who whips his son for underage drinking is still likely to have an alcoholic son, for example).

I know as I was growing up I didn't respect either scare tactics or "do as I say, not as I do." When my parents punished (and sometimes abused) me they almost always did it with poor impulse control and judgment and I didn't see the problem with me but them, and their violent means did not make me "respect" them, it just made me avoid them (which probably suited them just fine, all things considered).

However, Granny was always as fair as she could be and she never hit me out of anger, and the consequences were always the same (that is, didn't depend on her mood but rather my actions) and I usually got a warning before a spanking. And her I did respect, and I can count the times on one hand that she used corporal punishment on me because I WANTED to please her, and disappointing her was an even worse punishment than a belt.

My cousin (who also spent a lot of time living with Granny as I did) is the same way. He didn't respect hypocrites and people who just lashed out at him, he held such adults in contempt (and took pride in being tough enough to take what they dished out, though of course his defiance sometimes extended to escaping punishment until tempers cooled), but he respected Granny...and though he smart mouthed a lot of adults who whipped & paddled him for it, he'd angrily stand up for Granny to any who badmouthed her (and gotten disciplined for his lack of respect, too). But he was ornery, and I saw Granny use a belt on him a lot. Granny told me she knew he was going to be a difficult child when she saw him as a toddler run into a wall, he bounced off, shriek in rage, got up, and ran into the wall again even harder.

[Pix]

And btw, we get a lot of complaints about children running wild in the USA. Most of those seem grossly exaggerated to me (such as the slutty Halloween costumes that are supposedly rampant), and actually I've seen the media lie...for example, a thrift store I do business with sells children's clothes and reporters asked about a two piece top and asked if that was acceptable (which it was, together) but then cut it so it looked as if only one of the pieces was present (which would leave a little girl nearly topless) when she answered it was appropriate...and she had angry people come to her store over that (luckily she said her customers knew better, or she might've had to sue).

A big lie is that the ACLU will come after you if you spank your little one to stop him from playing with hot pans on the stove. Not once has any of them ever been able to prove one case of that, and they can't: the ACLU, while defending kids, is more about freedom of expression in schools (such as being disciplined for wearing a pentagram, be it suspension or paddling). That is the entire thing is because Christians want to abuse children (seriously, they've beaten & starved kids to death and when they go to prison for it the church lives up to its religion by bearing false witness and saying it was over a mere spanking), but they repeat their lies so much that parents who are anxious start to believe it. (It's true that our Child Protective Services can be ridiculous--not that they're likely to be, but they do exchange their apathy for extreme vigilance when they need more cases to justify their funding--but we actually have fundies to thank in part for that as they got that way over the Satanic Panics that fundamentalists got started in which they swore children were being ritually & sexually abused by secretive Satanists and succeeded in getting the government to take their paranoid psychosis seriously.)

And as for kids today? At least in the USA they seem to be better than previous generations...and btw, a lot of violence first went down in the USA after about 13 years of legalized abortion (meaning not so many unwanted teens were flooding the streets, whereas before it got worse & worse so that we got endless 70s vigilante movies) and then violence dropped significantly again as the last boomers entered their 30s. And then there's this:

http://reason.com/archives/2002/02/01/teen-demon-tracts

Kids these days. We all know the basic jeremiad: They're media-addled, affectless, nihilist, subliterate, a Clockwork Orange-style army of "superpredators," teen gunmen, and garden-variety sociopaths waiting to happen. Advertising has hypnotized them. Video games have conditioned them to kill without feeling. And pop culture has hammered every conceivable kind of coarseness -- from anonymous sex to Satanism, from glorified violence to Internet passivity -- into their poignantly echoing little craniums. Is it any wonder that most of them are but a bully's slight or a chatroom flame away from raining hot-lead vengeance on schoolrooms or playgrounds?

Well, yes, actually. It is, indeed, a considerable wonder that any part of this hysterical caricature should command serious discussion in the first place. As almost no media outlet is going to tell you, kids these days are astonishingly well-adjusted, nonviolent, educated, and polite. Nearly all the leading indicators of social ills among American adolescents -- drug use, violent assault, teen pregnancy, drop-out rates, you name it -- have been declining for at least 10 years now. More teens are graduating high school and attending college than ever before. A record number of American teens volunteer their time to charitable causes -- twice as many as their counterparts of 20 years past. Math SATs are at a 30-year high. Hell, even teen literacy is increasing: A recent survey conducted by the National Education Association found that 41 percent of teen respondents said they read 15 books or more a year. How many adults can claim a comparable intake?

[koridallos]

Thanks for this wonderful comment. I agree.