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mama
#11
rover330 Wrote:rainbowmum, are they allowed out after dark?

My mother passed this past month, actually, Lord rest her soul.

she didn't really tell me I couldn't ever form an adult relationship with anyone but her...

that's what I meant. I didn't mean to disparage or be negative. I love my mom too, but, I was allowed out after dark.

Nothing to worry about sweetie.
You know , letting your child after dark is a scary thing , it makes no difference if you are a mother or father , you always worry.

Actually I think my husband is way more protective over the boys than I am.
Being a parent is such a huge responsibility , you are in charge of someones life , one part of you is preparing your child for life in general, the other part is looking through dream eyes at your child at memories.

I am so very sorry you lost your mom.
Bighug

Always here for you.
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#12
I'm a mamma's boy, in fact I just recently bought a house with her as she had a nasty break-up with her partner and couldn't afford a house from the split proceeds of the sale of their house they bought together.

She gets concerned, but she knows there are boundaries and won't over step them. Since my brother and I have spent time living overseas and interstate, she know's that no matter how far away we are, our home is always with or close to our mother.

Having said that, I think my younger straight brother is more a mammas boy and is more of a source of concern than I am because he is a little more care free than I am.

A 40 year old man getting a call from mamma in the middle of a date because mamma wants him home....I think that is a a little extreme and beyond the realms of being a 'mamma's boy', that is more a mamma being a control freak and a bubba still on the boob (No independance).
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#13
dfiant Wrote:A 40 year old man getting a call from mamma in the middle of a date because mamma wants him home....I think that is a a little extreme and beyond the realms of being a 'mamma's boy', that is more a mamma being a control freak and a bubba still on the boob (No independance).

ok, let me state, I'm not even close to being a mamas boy but I gotta agree with what I quoted.
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#14
To me it's not an issue of being a mama's boy but rather a "sorry sack o' shit with no spine". Gimme a man any day, and if he treats his mama like she's the most wonderful thing in the world I'll love him even more!
Heart  Life's too short to miss an opportunity to show your love and affection!  Heart
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#15
It can be a fine line, respect and help out your parent(s) yes, assuming you still have them in your life but, to me the point of forming a lasting relationship is to form bonds that will still be there when the parent(s) aren't.

Now I have no problem with, in fact I respect a man that is good to his parent(s) and helps him/her/them out but, where I have a problem is if we are on a planned date and he drops everything, me included to go do what the parent(s) ask and, it's something that could have waited until after our date.

I mean if mom calls and says "Hey hot water line just broke and I don't know what to do." Sure, off we go to deal with that but, if it's "I made your favorite cake, come have a slice with me." and date takes off, forget it, I'm not playing that game.
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#16
I have been labeled a "Mama's Boy" a time or two. I have always had a special bond with her. We can talk about everything and anything. I call her once a week to chat. My parents are getting up there in age and I think it is important to keep in touch while I still have them around. On the same note though I am an independent adult that lives nine hundred miles away from my mother. I moved from New York to South Carolina back in 2006. The apron strings got cut along time ago. My coming out as bisexual certainly wasn't how she viewed my future turning out. She just wants to see me happy and respects the fact that I am a grown adult that can make my own choices. She may not agree with all the choices I make but she loves and supports me none the less. For me the label of "Mama's Boy" is a badge of honor.
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#17
Blue, that was sort of the situation.

As much as I miss him, so much that it hurts, this particular situation was a when his mom divorced his dad and expects him to replace the father as the man of the house. Not in a carnal way of course, but as the man taking care of mowing the lawn, all the things that a husband would normally do.

My own opinion is that when she divorced her husband, for whatever reason, her eldest son is not responsible for taking her husband's place to the exclusion of him ever being allowed to form his own relationship. Wouldn't matter if he was gay or straight, actually... any relationship would be a threat to that dynamic.

thanks for replying, peace.
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#18
marvinteck that was what my mother told me before she passed.

she wasn't always in a happy relationship, she told me she didn't care so much if I was gay or straight, she just wanted me to be happy and with somebody who would treat me like they love me and not be, well, mean.

I guess I would rather be alone than in an unhappy relationship. The cat never gives me any shit man... she loves me for who I am. Tiger

nothing wrong with that man. thanks for replying.
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#19
I guess I don't believe that he should be condemned to being his father's replacement until Mom dies. Sorry to be blunt, but, that is what is going on. I've seen it more than once.
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#20
I have to say if it's mowing the lawn, cleaning the gutters, maintaining the structure, plumbing, electrical, etc... that IS his place as the eldest son.

Now if he runs off mid date because mom want's the tulips weeded, that is a problem, but if he can't go out until after he mows the lawn Saturday, not a problem.

And if mom calls because something broke or is leaking and, he has to go fix it, or at least do something to let it be on hold until later, then go on with the date fine, emergencies happen.

I mean if Jes, my daughter called with a broken water pipe or the heater not working mid date and, her husband weren't available, I'd take my date with me, but we would go see to the problem.
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