More than friends?

[rishi93]

Hi all.rishi here, 20 year old guy studyin in a college in india..i'm madly attracted to a guy in my class..The problem is he's one of my very good friends..he makes me feel special about myself. Whenever i sit next to him on the bench in class i sense some below the desk flirting as in he'll stick his leg next to mine and at times also move it as if he's tryin to feel mine. He'll also touch me alot in public but in private i feel a resistance if i try to get close to him..the problem is i dont know if he does that due to our friendship or he too likes me. I have given him so many signs showin that i like him but he doesn't reciprocate..but at times i really feel he does care for me alot and that i matter to him alot and maybe in more than a friend way..i'm closeted and will never want to lose his friendship at any cost..please help me out!!p.s. He once had a stage performance and he looked at me throughout as if to dedicate it to me..i also can't still figure out if he's gay or not

[jdawg903]

Hi all.rishi here, 20 year old guy studyin in a college in india..i'm madly attracted to a guy in my class..The problem is he's one of my very good friends..he makes me feel special about myself. Whenever i sit next to him on the bench in class i sense some below the desk flirting as in he'll stick his leg next to mine and at times also move it as if he's tryin to feel mine. He'll also touch me alot in public but in private i feel a resistance if i try to get close to him..the problem is i dont know if he does that due to our friendship or he too likes me. I have given him so many signs showin that i like him but he doesn't reciprocate..but at times i really feel he does care for me alot and that i matter to him alot and maybe in more than a friend way..i'm closeted and will never want to lose his friendship at any cost..please help me out!!p.s. He once had a stage performance and he looked at me throughout as if to dedicate it to me..i also can't still figure out if he's gay or not

Hey there rishi!
I live in toronto and my best friend is indian too and came to canada maybe 4 years ago (I am white). Anyways, him and I have the best friendship that someone could think of, I had the biggest crush on him for the longest time, and we even live together too, so you could imagine what I thought of him because I was a little unsure of his sexuality as well. It's strange a little sometimes cause he always wants to hug (and we do so all the time when in private and they're often extended where we'll just stand around grasping each other for extended periods), we give each other pats on the head a lot too, or he'll just stare and smile at me a lot. For awhile now (even after I came out as gay to him, which he was totally supportive of) he did these things even more, and we even continued to take naps together in my bed. He says its very "warm" lol.

Anyways, there's been numerous occasions where he'll tell me stuff like how much he loves me, and that he couldn't live without me, how much he cares for me, and our friendship means the world to him, and I would do the same. Despite him doing all this stuff, we have never done anything sexual. Even after I came out he said he was straight.

I think some people have some very genuine and affectionate ways of showing their friendship to someone else. Some people just have such a strong bond that being somewhat intimate doesn't seem strange, even if its with another guy and your straight. Your friend may just be like my friend, and is comfortable enough with his sexuality to express this kind of intimacy towards you.

Find someone else like I did, you don't wanna ruin a good friendship and it may seem like he is the only one for you but believe me you will get over it. I'm not sure if you have tried coming out to him but this might be a good idea. If he says that he is gay too then you guys could build something, if not then he is totally just an affectionate straight guy lol.

All the best, I know it can be difficult but if I could get over it I know you can too! I realized I valued my friendship with him a lot more, and so I don't think of him in that way anymore, I was just confusing my emotions.