Give Bad Advice

[monk]

So do mine - let's put them together and see if they'll mate.

The years seem to go too fast these days.

[elad12]

Years are now 4000 days long and winter starts today and lasts for 1000 days

I shoes are a little too big

[Lalo]

Hit your feet with a mallet until they swell up to the right size.



I have a ton of yard work to do.

[partisan]

Get a couple of hungry billy goats to do your lawn, they will eat everything

My windows are drafty

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Stuff the cracks with Jam, preferably with Strawberry Jam. Thus it will be a window jamb.

The ice cream is melting in my bowl....

[trywait]

use an ice bowl

im going to bed early

[Beau]

Don't bother. You'll just get tired tomorrow.

I need more money.

[partisan]

Me too, let's Rob a bank f**k it!

My kettle never stops boiling, it doesn't click

[monk]

Leave it long enough it will boil dry and explode - no more annoying kettle!

I have to pay the rent today.

[partisan]

You dont "have" to, you could always pay me instead, i have some barn space

My kettle exploded and i havent got another