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I am not good at flirting.
#11
I am not good at flirting.

Then don't do it.

I rarely flirt, very rarely. Never needed to, I tended to have other guys flirt with me, or buy me drinks and try to get me plastered enough for me to go home with them. That never worked, I tend to get knee locked the drunker I get.... Alcohol + Sex, ain't gonna happen with this one.

Yeah you want somebody in your life... Everybody does. but do you want 'just anyone' or do you want 'The One'?

It seems to me the wrong way to go about finding the right somebody if you have to go and be someone you are not. How are they going to find YOU under that mask of somebody you ain't?

Be yourself, if you are not a flirt, then don't flirt. If you don't talk at parties, fine stay silent, listen and smile at the stupidness that is small talk.

If you don't call numbers, then stop asking for them... No sense in getting all of these numbers if you don't use them.

Who am I?

Ask yourself that, often and deeply... figure out who "I" is, and be that guy.

Seriously, "I" will attract the right mate. "I" will shine out brightly, catch his eye and draw him in.

No its not going to happen immediately. Yes you want someone, but not just anyone right?

An old Friend of mine (Bill S-something) once confided in me a simple truth:

This above all: to thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any man


He was one smart dude.
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#12
Mister tinkles i feel like that too when i catch someone looking at me. But in the group im joining, we are sitting like circle so everybody can see each other. And there's nothing behind me and they are directly looking in my eyes when i catch them.
Bowyn aerrow i know what you mean and i am not trying to be something im not, but how can i find the one if i do nothing about it? I'm going with my friend and because of her mom's rules we have to leave early and EVEN if one of them wants to talk to me personally i don't know how's that gonna work. I liked some of them in that way (and im not only talking about how they look but their personalities as well) and i did nothing about it. I can't understand the logic of waiting because everybody is alone in the same room without even trying to talk to each other and we don't even know the oppurtunities we're missing.
And about the solution.. i have no idea! maybe i can say ''hey everyone im going to give my phone to the person who's sitting next to me and she'll do the same. If somebody wants to talk to me then add your number in my phone, if don't just pass the phone to the next person. Because i am tired of being lonely and i want new friends''. That way i'll make new friends and have a chance with finding the one? Or is it sound too cheap? i don't want to sound like.. somebody who just wants to get laid.
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#13
Rumble88 Wrote:Bowyn aerrow i know what you mean and i am not trying to be something im not, but how can i find the one if i do nothing about it? I'm going with my friend and because of her mom's rules we have to leave early and EVEN if one of them wants to talk to me personally i don't know how's that gonna work. I liked some of them in that way (and im not only talking about how they look but their personalities as well) and i did nothing about it. I can't understand the logic of waiting because everybody is alone in the same room without even trying to talk to each other and we don't even know the oppurtunities we're missing.

And about the solution.. i have no idea! maybe i can say ''hey everyone im going to give my phone to the person who's sitting next to me and she'll do the same. If somebody wants to talk to me then add your number in my phone, if don't just pass the phone to the next person. Because i am tired of being lonely and i want new friends''. That way i'll make new friends and have a chance with finding the one? Or is it sound too cheap? i don't want to sound like.. somebody who just wants to get laid.

Honestly, when the one is around you they will notice you and all of this will work out.

When the right one comes along, don't be surprised that your natural flirt is instantly turned on and you are as flirty, chatty, whatever you need to be.

When the right guy comes along, you will naturally tend to do things which may be usually uncomfortable with others. You will most likely surprise yourself.

Look, you are young and have a whole life ahead of yourself.

Here I am an old man (46) and I surprised myself (and keep surprising myself) with the things I have done and said with my new main squeeze. Yes, even way up here in the twilight years, love wins through.

The logic is waiting is so you don't end up making bad memories with the wrong person. Trust me, I have done that over and over again. Rushing in and settling for just anyone doesn't work out. It's messy, its mean, its all sorts of not so nice things.

No doubt you will make mistakes, have a few false starts. There are important lessons to learn from such things. But honestly, I hope you find the right guy soonest.

A little loneliness doesn't kill you, it may strengthen you, it may make you appreciate the right person when they come along even more.

It is worth the wait, really it is.
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#14
Rumble88 Wrote:Mister tinkles i feel like that too when i catch someone looking at me. But in the group im joining, we are sitting like circle so everybody can see each other. And there's nothing behind me and they are directly looking in my eyes when i catch them.
Bowyn aerrow i know what you mean and i am not trying to be something im not, but how can i find the one if i do nothing about it? I'm going with my friend and because of her mom's rules we have to leave early and EVEN if one of them wants to talk to me personally i don't know how's that gonna work. I liked some of them in that way (and im not only talking about how they look but their personalities as well) and i did nothing about it. I can't understand the logic of waiting because everybody is alone in the same room without even trying to talk to each other and we don't even know the oppurtunities we're missing.
And about the solution.. i have no idea! maybe i can say ''hey everyone im going to give my phone to the person who's sitting next to me and she'll do the same. If somebody wants to talk to me then add your number in my phone, if don't just pass the phone to the next person. Because i am tired of being lonely and i want new friends''. That way i'll make new friends and have a chance with finding the one? Or is it sound too cheap? i don't want to sound like.. somebody who just wants to get laid.



Maybe at the end of a meeting one day, you can tell people you are going out for coffee or something and if anybody wants to come along, tell them where you will be and at what time....and see who shows up.

Even if a few people show, possibly the one who seems to be interested in you will sit closest to you. You never know.
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#15
SolemnBoy Wrote:I understand that you want a boyfriend but you should wait until you actually feel something for another person and not just find one to escape loneliness.tool Smile
Gosh, probably I'm pessimist, or you are too optimist, but the reason of 99% of marriages is escape from loneliness...
Sheep
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#16
We'll se what'll happen. Thank you all for your suggestions.
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