Should I tell him the reason I'm ignoring him or just go on ignoring him?

[MisterTinkles]

I also should add this:

Desperate people will always, ALWAYS read things into situations that are not there.

Im not saying youre desperate, but you seem to be wanting a great deal, which can lead to desperation.

Im not a "touchy feely" person myself, but Ive worked with a few guys who were. But I realized that this is their nature, their personality, not any form of "come on" from them. Regardless of what I might say in other posts about people in general, there ARE some actual nice, decent people left in the world. Unfortunately they are EXTREMELY RARE. And I have met a couple in my lifetime so far.

They are just nice guys. Apparently they were raised by huggy/touchy/feely parents or they were totally ignored as children and long for being "touchy feely" with all the people they like. There is nothing sexual about this at all, its just how they are.

For gay guys who take these people as an invitation for something its not, it ends up in disaster, hurt feelings, or even a punch in the face.

Im not saying any of this will happen to you, Im saying you just cannot take it upon yourself to think that he is THAT friendly because he "like" likes you, and not because he's just an overly friendly person.

Overly friendly people tend to set themselves up for hurt on their own accord also. They expect that everybody will like them, as they cannot comprehend anyone NOT liking them for any reason. Ive had to deal with this a lot in my life. Overly friendly people make my skin crawl.....cant help it, they just do.

It doesnt mean I hate them or anything, I just dont like it. As I stated before, Im not a "touchy feely" person....never have been. These people take this as a "knife in the back" most of the time.

They think its something THEY did or something THEY said, when in fact its just the way I am. As being overly friendly is to them, "dont touch me" is to me.

You cant be mean on purpose to these people without REALLY hurting thier feelings. I dont know about this guy you work with, but the way you described him, he sounds like he might be one of these types of people. Dont ignore him. You dont have to hold conversations with him if you dont want too, but dont ignore him.

[gilhooly]

I am old and have been through a lot of things that made feel bitter. One thing I never regretted. On six occasions I saw a straight guy and got an immediate crush. I told all 6 how I felt and went to bed with 3 of 6 guys. The other 3 turned me down with a smile. they were obviously flattered by my statement that I thought they sexually aroused me. I was turned down but not one of them ever made me feel uncomfortable. They all acted like they liked me better and were very comfortable working with a gay guy who was not secretive. Honesty is incredibly sexy in a guy. Even straight guys love to hang out with honest guys.

Tell him how you feel. He will or should be flattered at your feelings. We all want to think we're sexy. If you get turned down as I did on 3 occassions, I continued to smile and kid the guy about how he was making a big mistake. I burst out laughing one time. A friend had gotten married. He realized I was a lot easier to get along with than his new wife. You made a mistake, Ron? Yes, I did John. Tough luck. You married her, take your pleasure with her. If you like my new friend and I will take you out to dinner. I enjoyed watching his regret as I left. he finally understood what it feels like to be turned down. It was an educational experience he needed to feel. He had been very lucky with girls but I was the better catch. Ron came again after his divorce and I tried him. I liked my new guy better and dropped him in a hurry. Tom asked me where I was that night, I muttered I had seen an old friend and had a drink. Tom was suspicious but we never annoyed each other with questioning.