On stage Kiss +First kiss ever = Me scared.

[Rainbowmum]

Oh Hayden sweetheart, you are not going to embarrass yourself.
Just let it happen, do not over think things too much.
Fall into character and enjoy the ride.

[LateBloomer]

I know she's had a number of boyfriends so of course there is no doubt that there will be only one kiss-virgin in this situation.

Hmm. I see a double win here!



First of all, I can't think of a better teacher. She has experience with guys, you're gay, maybe she already knows that and will feel safe (more comfortable).

You could try suggesting to her that you both first have a "practice" kiss in private in order to eliminate the pressure of being watched for the first time. She should know you're gay at this point so she doesn't suspect you'll try to put a move on her.

But listen I have a little more advice even though I'm not an actor (and I don't care what Shakespeare said: "the world is stage and we're all players").



LateBloomer talking here: I was 27 before I kissed my first person (a woman). Kissing is HALF about what you do with your lips and HALF about what you do with your hands.

Every good kiss starts with a warm touch or embrace. You want to be CLOSE to the person. It's intimate, unless we're talking about a peck on the cheek or forehead. But you said the director wants a "passionate" kiss.

So, you're not a fish (all lips). You're a man, with warm hands and long arms and a broad chest. Use your whole body to hold her close when you approach for the lip lock.



In fact, if you do choose to try the "practice kiss in private" you might just start off with a hug. And not a quick slap on the back either! Hold each other. Then separate. Get your professional bearings and try the hug with a kiss next.

It's like building blocks. Build a foundation first. Move on up to the kiss if you don't feel like making a leap.

Again, doing it first in private might eliminate the "spectator" pressure if you can assure your acting partner you don't have any ulterior motives.

Good luck.
Let us know how it goes!

[LateBloomer]

Sorry I just realized you consider yourself "curious".

That's ok.

Same strategy applies.

You might get a date out of it.

[Nick9]

wow, Latebloomer's advice is priceless!

[princealbertofb]

I agree with LateBloomer (and Nick) that the advice given there is priceless. The acting part is why you need rehearsals at every stage of the play. Of course the stronger you feel the part, the easier it will become to inhabit the character.

My acting tip would be to understand what makes this male character want to kiss this woman so passionately. What is the feeling underlying this scene and what are the female character's feelings about this scene? It's obviously a time when a lot has built up in the previous encounters (I'm supposing) and now's the time to connect fully and truly and the kiss is just the natural outcome of the feelings generated in this particular instance of both their lives.

If you are not quite sure what is motivating this kiss (from what has happened before) then that's what you should be discussing with the director and your female counterpart. Does she understand why her character is kissing this man? Once you have determined what the motivations are, then maybe you can act more in keeping with your character and let yourself be inhabited by his persona. Remember all the time that this is a representation of reality but NOT reality. Acting and onstage work is often about exaggeration, about enhancement. The gestures you perform have to be bigger than life to be perceived by a distant audience as the real thing. It's like the sound part of acting. Your voice can't be your normal talking voice, it has to be a voice that is trained to project.

The same goes with gestures and in this case the kiss.

I think in the cinema, a couple will often be seen as kissing when in fact one of the actors is kissing the other actor's chin, just below the mouth. It looks like a mouth lock but isn't. The hands can come into play partly to cover what the mouths are not actually doing. Maybe you could suggest that to your partner and try some of these.

What you might also ask your director is what kind of lighting you're going to have. The director knows full well that acting on stage is different from acting normally in life, and s/he will take it to heart to enhance any effect s/he wants to put across to the audience by using any effects that s/he can use to further his/her point, adding music, noises, lighting, set, choice of positions etc.

Will you be standing when you kiss, will you be lying down when you kiss...? The position may prove tricky, or uncomfortable in any case.

Also picture that what makes a kiss exciting is not so much the lock of mouths, when it happens, but all the stuff going on beforehand, the way you hold, the way you lock eyes, (or not), the way you approch the two faces for the final lock. (so LB's suggestion of hugging then trying the kiss makes a lot of sense, at least initially while practising.)

One last thing that springs to mind is the degree of undress that is involved. Is this a kiss to be performed fully clothed? Or will some skin be showing? Arms, hands, legs, shoulders, neck? Starting a kiss with other parts of the body can also be extremely sexy or inviting. Try standing behind her, holding her waist, and kiss her shoulder or neck, then up her cheek until she turns her head to kiss your mouth... We're used here, in France, to kissing people on the cheek. Could your kiss start with a cheek to cheek, then move into a mouth lock? As LB said, working your way (and courage) up to the real thing, but taking it in stages. Maybe your partner would be more comfortable if it was in small steps. Becoming comfortable with each other's embrace and each other's body shape, and heat, odour, etc... Make sure you're clean, and keep a clean mouth, and you'll probably be ok.
I'm not sure your director will ask you to stick your tongues into each other's faces.
If s/he does want a real mouth to mouth kiss, remember that there is all the lip nibbling, the lip licking with the tip of your tongue, that will go and help to make your kiss more real and more fun to perform. Once you' ve started kissing someone, you'll be surprised how easy it is to learn and to get right. Learn to relax enough to get what the enjoyment of kissing is about.

Good luck with the first time.

[Hayden]

Thank you all very much for your very welcome advice. Thanks especially to Latebloomer and princealbertofb. Believe me when I say that your suggestions will be greatly utilized. It's good to have practical, physical motions to carry through with instead of instructions like, "Okay, and now.... kiss!"

I also appreciate the idea of determining exactly what motivates the kiss and the characters. The combination of physical sureness/comfort and "acting" should make this experience easier. Thanks again to all who chimed in. I think tomorrow will be the day we rehearse the kiss, so... we'll see.

[princealbertofb]

Of course, you must let us know how it went.... mile: take care, Hayden.

[Hayden]

Hey all.

Just an update on this odd situation of mine:

A few days ago we were getting to the kissing scene and right before it happened I looked at her with "are we going to do this?" kind of look. She said "kiss me." And so I did.

Now, the way the scene works is thusly: There are a multitude of kissing scenes in the show. The very first kiss is one which I am supposed to initiate. The next kiss after that is one which she initiates.

How did the kiss go? Pretty lackluster, I think. But at least it happened and we got the first one out of the way. She made a comment afterwards to the director which was something to the effect of, "I practically had to attack him to get him to kiss me." I guess I didn't move in as much as I thought I did. I'm sure I looked pretty inept, but again, who cares? At least it happened.

During the time between the first kiss and the next, some strapping, over-confident fellow waltz in the theatre, sits down, grabs a script and begins highlighting through the text. I had no idea who this guy, but I got a sense that he and this girl are friends. When it came time for her to kiss me (a much more passionate and lengthy kiss) she wouldn't do it. She got all squirrly again and said something like "Uh... we'll practice this later."

This made me feel very confused. I thought 'was the first kiss that bad? Is she that disgusted with me?' I also had this weird thought the whole time that this new guy had come to replace me because the director decided I was doing a poor job overall, and he is much better looking than I am and therefore more believable as a love interest to this girl.

Anyway I stressed about that all for a few days (my vivid imagination and occasional bouts of low self-esteem sometimes combine to produce some truly fantastic thoughts about what other people are thinking). Then at rehearsal the same thing basically happened. We did the first kiss (I think I was a little more confident), then the director asked to see it again because it was too brief, and the girl basically refused (politely, I guess) and put it all off again to another day. The same strange guy was sitting in the audience again. I found out then that he is actually her boyfriend.

So that's where things are. The girl and I are still supposed to meet sometime in the uncertain future and work these scenes in private, but we'll see I guess.

Thanks again to those who offered me some help. It definitely gave me the confidence to do even what little I actually did do... if that makes sense.

[princealbertofb]

Well, Hayden, thanks for the update. I think you can only get better at it now. Remember, you are not interested in this girl as a romantic interest and whether this guy is there or not, if you're acting (both of you) he should not feel uncomfortable with it... He's getting all the good stuff, you're not. Don't worry about it. Just remember to go with the feelings, if you can. Of course keep this professional. I sense that your partner is the more embarrassed of the two, to be honest.

[LateBloomer]

I'd also like to thank you for the update Hayden.

I agree with PA that you are showing greater composure and professionalism than your partner.

It takes guts to do theater and you have put yourself in a vulnerable position and handled everything a million times better than I EVER would have at your age and experience.

Take a bow!