I didn’t have any relationships in k-12. 3 years ago; starting college and work I meet a co worker whom I became attracted to. I had sexual thoughts about her and told her I liked her. I said at 22 I’d come out. She moved about 3 hours away with her girlfriend and I seen her once since then. We occasionally text. 3 years later, I don’t have the same feelings for her anymore. In fact she’s the only girl I’ve felt this way about. Since then I’ve been interested in guys sexually and emotionally. I don’t want to hurt her feelings by not coming out to her. Having learned sexuality isn’t based on age, but experience. I also hope that she doesn’t tell other people that I had a crush on her and said I’d come out at 22.Any advice or information of this matter would be greatly appreciated. It’s been stressful lately.
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If it were me, my feelings wouldn't be hurt in any way by telling the truth about this. Saying you're surprised might help.
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I wouldn't be surprised if she's NOT going around talking about you to other people. I dunno how close you guys were, but it's possible she just isn't thinking about you very much, if at all.
But it wouldn't hurt to talk to her, if only to clear your own head up.
And if you don't talk to her, no big deal either. I believe this is pretty much between just the 2 of you, I doubt it's going to anyone further (except MAYBE her girlfriend, and even if it does go there, that's where it stops). So just relax, it's not as big a deal. Even if you were gonna tell her that you still liked her, she has a girlfriend, so what would it have mattered anyway? I really doubt it's gonna matter too much to her.
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Do what makes you comfortable and what is worry free.
If you do decide to tell her ,ask her not to tell anyone.
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thank you all for the help. It's been appriciated and removed stress. Simple words of advice do go along way. Very generous to share such answers.
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also why does it matter anyway?
its a long time ago, who is really going to care who you had a fling with ?
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Just ignore, dont care what she says
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