to stay or to go .... i just dont know

[Aeneas]

If you have to come on here and ask what to do about a situation like that.....I think you already know what the answer is.


No offense, but this is like the 10th time Ive read this story.
Either theres one person with several different logins, or theres a LOT of masochists on here.

you are too harsh.


its not easy to end a relationship. the OP is obviously into him - he just wishes the guy stops lying and cheating. he is not asking for the stars, is he?

i went through a similar situation recently. its hard for us to understand why people do it. especially when they keep repeating that they love you.


posting here helps them/us be sure of making the right call (regardless of how obvious it is).

[Counselor]

Either theres one person with several different logins, or theres a LOT of masochists on here.

Masochists derive sexual arousal from pain, so your terminology is a little off.

What we have a lot of here are optimists that want things to improve but think they are better off in whatever situation they depict rather than on their own. Are they less wrong because of their optimism? No, but they aren't getting satisfaction from the circumstances or they wouldn't ask for advice. Pointing out that the conditions are not unique is like saying a relationship takes more than one person, and does little to show the person asking for advice that they have the power to control their comfort in their relationship.

At the core, relationships (gay, straight, trans, what the hell ever) function the same way. The level of understanding is only impeded by the amount of communication and common denominators between those in the relationship.

donkeywizard, if you want to make this relationship work, why are you asking strangers on the internet what you should do, instead of talking to your boyfriend and discussing his activity beyond what you see. If you mean what you should as his boyfriend to him, he will want to take the initiative and do what he needs to in order to prove his loyalty. From the sound of it, he's not ready for such direct communication, and you may be better off letting him go until he is.