Cats: Threats or Menace?

[Pix]

Now that the Republicans are starting to give up on the gay issue perhaps cats will become the new gay:

http://christwire.org/2009/10/the-dark-u...ownership/

Pets have a special place in American’s hearts. They can be play partners for our children, guardians of our property and friends for the elderly. They open our eyes to the wonderful beauty of the natural world. They can teach our young the responsibilities of ownership and stewardship. And they can become an integral part of a family’s daily life. But is welcoming any beast into the sanctity and privacy of your home always a good idea? What are the health risks and moral implications of having an overly familiar relationship with an untrainable creature?

Unlike dogs, cats do not have ancestral roots in any kind of work or service. Dogs were domesticated to help man hunt, ward off farm predators and protect the home from intruders. From there, they grew to be even tamer, developing into great companions for children. Modern felines, on the other hand, are direct descendants of a cult worship that began in Ancient Egypt 3000 years ago. They were not bred for any specific attributes but were kept because people believed them to be incarnations of vengeful pagan gods. In that epoch, the penalty for killing a cat, even accidentally, was death!

Cats were so worshipped in this myth-obsessed and polytheistic time that great parties of indulgence were held to celebrate them. The Festival of Bastet in the town of Bubastis is one famous example where the occultism of cat worship reached heights of a very carnal nature

In fact, amazingly not one of the Apostles ever owned a cat! (It goes without saying that Jesus never did.)

The Bible and modern law are both clear on the responsibility human beings have to protect and nurture the natural world. The concept, known as “stewardship,” means that we have been entrusted with dominion over our animals, that we are to be superior to them. People are to train animals and not let animals train them. This is a very important point as we have seen above with many contemporary women’s relationships with their cats. Worship of cats, a pagan ritual if there ever was one, is truly a sin. History teaches us that it is ethically wrong for us to live our lives in service of our lesser creatures. It puts our morality and humanity at risk

A FANCY FEAST OF FERAL IMMORALITY

"Cats are prowlers, uncanny creatures of the night. Cruelty and play are one for them. They live by and for fear, practicing being scared or spooking humans by sudden rushings and ambushes. Cats dwell in the occult, that is, the 'hidden' The cat totally is in league with chthonian nature, Christianity’s mortal enemy. Compared to dogs, kindly eager to please, cats are autocrats of naked self-interest. They are both amoral and immoral, consciously breaking rules. Their 'evil' look at such times is no human projection: the cat may be the only animal who savors the perverse or reflects upon it." –Camilla Paglia

The above statement made by lesbian professor Camilla Paglia is meant to be a sort of liberal celebration of the self-serving psyche of felines. Unfortunately, it is all too accurate when it comes to the moral implications of the cat lifestyle for modern society. These are ungrateful and unresponsive animals that spend their days lazing around the house from one spot of sunlight to the next. They contribute very little to family life and tend to shun your attempts at friendship and training. Many an individual has come home to find their last roll of toilet paper mockingly destroyed by these little monsters. They practice a loud and proud promiscuity while discouraging their owners from forming their own real human relationships. Let them in the door and they will run your life.

A new study has confirmed that cats are highly manipulative creatures that have learned to dominate their human masters. Exploiting our kindness is their unique specialty. Scientists have established, “similarities between a domestic cat’s cry and the cry of a human baby– a sound that humans are highly sensitive to.” With special purring tones, cats have learned to train the childless among you. They train you to fetch their food, scratch behind their ears and do whatever else they require, turning you into overworked servants in your own home.

The sad, almost perverse domination cats hold over their owner’s lives is celebrated all over the internet. One of the worst offenders and a website surely worthy of a mental health study is icanhascheezburger.com (“I Can Haz Cheez Burger”. This has become one of the most popular destinations online, a bizarre cult of cat worship that almost seems inspired by Bastet’s debauched festivals. Much like the ancient Egyptians, people today have anthropomorphized their pets to the extreme, giving them human emotions and an offbeat and deep-throated human language that they exchange in endless pictures and comment sections

Remember, it's religious and speaking on moral values so you don't get to question its wisdom. :tongue:

Oh, I guess the above is an excuse to post this, too:

[VileKyle]

Screw that. My cat is family. If Republicans touch my cat, they'll be sorry they fought for gun rights.

[Chase]

I just saw this today on thethinkingatheist forum:



I haven't stopped laughing. Cats. At least I know cats are incapable of hating me for what I believe in.

[Corsac]

There's more important things to be worrying about then cats. This is a sad attempt at diverting attention in my opinion.

[Chase]

Edited - My Internet is going funky and I accidentally reposted. Anyway, to those who have visited christwire who found this article disturbing, please look up the definition of satire.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

While its true cats were a religious thing, they were also hard workers. They kept the rat populations down and in places where Christians went on a killing spree during the burning times hunting witches and cats they ended up with the flea borne plagues because they didn't have cats to keep the rat population down.

Who ever wrote this claptrap needs to be dragged out and burnt at the stake, sans a basket of cats. The damn idiot doesn't understand our true responsibility to nature. We were to tend the garden, not rule over it, not dominate it and definitely not to train it to suit our will.

That is why God made man stupid, and its not until man ate of the fruit of knowledge that man went bat crazy and started raping and pillaging the world.

It is the fact that mankind learned how to make fire, weapons and how to break the earth that God got his panties up in a bunch and wiped out the whole earth. That perfection of man in Noah was all over man learning too much not because of 'sin'.

Of course the moron who wrote this treatise against Cats is to stupid to read the bible or any of the attending sacred books. Instead s/he is going to use whatever man-written doctrine and bits and pieces out of history books to target felines.

The idiot should be drawn and quartered, keel hauled, put on the wrack, then burnt at the stake just to make certain it doesn't breed and multiply.

[partisan]

I read most of that, yes cats were worshiped,we all know that, I only disagree with how to treat animals, I think a cat should have free will, I would never have a house cat, I once had a cat who would visit me every night when I lived in a caravan, I don't not own him, but I think he liked my place because it was calm and quiet, he was absolutely Gorgous, and he slept everynight on. My bed, the window always open for him to come and go, I would here his bells jingling, and then a small black shape would pop down beside me, sometimes I wouldn't even here him come, and I've kissed cuddled cats and dogs my whole life and never had a medical complaint

[partisan]

Read it all, a bit crazy I refuse to believe any animal is intrinsically evil, yes cats hunt birds, mice, that's there instinct, responsible owners should put bells on there cats so birds can here them coming! All I agree is not to put human emotion onto your cat too much, constantly making baby remarks, don't send your cat mad

[Genersis]

While its true cats were a religious thing, they were also hard workers. They kept the rat populations down and in places where Christians went on a killing spree during the burning times hunting witches and cats they ended up with the flea borne plagues because they didn't have cats to keep the rat population down.

Who ever wrote this claptrap needs to be dragged out and burnt at the stake, sans a basket of cats. The damn idiot doesn't understand our true responsibility to nature. We were to tend the garden, not rule over it, not dominate it and definitely not to train it to suit our will.

That is why God made man stupid, and its not until man ate of the fruit of knowledge that man went bat crazy and started raping and pillaging the world.

It is the fact that mankind learned how to make fire, weapons and how to break the earth that God got his panties up in a bunch and wiped out the whole earth. That perfection of man in Noah was all over man learning too much not because of 'sin'.

Of course the moron who wrote this treatise against Cats is to stupid to read the bible or any of the attending sacred books. Instead s/he is going to use whatever man-written doctrine and bits and pieces out of history books to target felines.

The idiot should be drawn and quartered, keel hauled, put on the wrack, then burnt at the stake just to make certain it doesn't breed and multiply.

Whoa!
Chill.
This isn't exactly a new sentiment.

[cardiganwearer]

A fine example of Poe's Law.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poe%27s_law

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christwire