Hoping to help others and I suppose help myself.
04-21-2013, 01:47 AM
I just want to share my story, I'm not sure it'll help anyone really but I'll put it out there.
So basically I came out at 16, before I came out I was decently confident in my homosexuality, I've been in relationships with girls and never once really... loved them? I guess that's what sparked the doubt, I also wanted nothing to do with them sexually, and then well... porn came into the picture and BAM. Figured out I was gay and for the majority of my life I was in denial of it due to being grown into a VERY religious household where I was dragged into the religion and to believing homosexuality was wrong and all that garbage. So I feared for my soul for awhile, then eventually took my leave on religion.(another story for another time) I decided (other then close friends, when I came out to them they didn't care.) the first person I'd tell was the most important to me. My mom. I personally needed some moral support telling her as I have previouslly asked her before her opinion on same sex marriage and was met with the passionate response of "I WOULD NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE SUPPORT THAT" So... call it stupidity but I came out to her first. She in a short burst of anger said "I don't know why you think thats such a big surprise to me!" Glared at my innocent bystander of a friend and walked off. So, I decided she may have of needed some space and went to my friends house, and came back around 7 and she was fine. It's still an awkward subject for her, but I'm proud over my sexuality and she knows it.
On a brighter note my grandmother who is much MUCH more passionate over her religion had a much brighter reaction. I came out to her over facebook (call me a wimp if you must, but due to her religious views I really didn't have the guts to tell her in person, at least this way she can think I'm a demon in privacy.) She is one of those religious people who believe in gay-straight therapy. Those despicable people. Anyway, she said the next few words that I wish my mom would've said to me. "I love you." That made my day, more so because I expected such a drastic response.
Anyway if there's a moral to the story it's just that you can't expect exactly how much a person is going to care. The majority don't, and most of the time you spend days or weeks worrying about how they might react when in reality, they don't.
So if that helps anyway thats great, and if not it was just nice to share a story.
So basically I came out at 16, before I came out I was decently confident in my homosexuality, I've been in relationships with girls and never once really... loved them? I guess that's what sparked the doubt, I also wanted nothing to do with them sexually, and then well... porn came into the picture and BAM. Figured out I was gay and for the majority of my life I was in denial of it due to being grown into a VERY religious household where I was dragged into the religion and to believing homosexuality was wrong and all that garbage. So I feared for my soul for awhile, then eventually took my leave on religion.(another story for another time) I decided (other then close friends, when I came out to them they didn't care.) the first person I'd tell was the most important to me. My mom. I personally needed some moral support telling her as I have previouslly asked her before her opinion on same sex marriage and was met with the passionate response of "I WOULD NEVER UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE SUPPORT THAT" So... call it stupidity but I came out to her first. She in a short burst of anger said "I don't know why you think thats such a big surprise to me!" Glared at my innocent bystander of a friend and walked off. So, I decided she may have of needed some space and went to my friends house, and came back around 7 and she was fine. It's still an awkward subject for her, but I'm proud over my sexuality and she knows it.
On a brighter note my grandmother who is much MUCH more passionate over her religion had a much brighter reaction. I came out to her over facebook (call me a wimp if you must, but due to her religious views I really didn't have the guts to tell her in person, at least this way she can think I'm a demon in privacy.) She is one of those religious people who believe in gay-straight therapy. Those despicable people. Anyway, she said the next few words that I wish my mom would've said to me. "I love you." That made my day, more so because I expected such a drastic response.
Anyway if there's a moral to the story it's just that you can't expect exactly how much a person is going to care. The majority don't, and most of the time you spend days or weeks worrying about how they might react when in reality, they don't.
So if that helps anyway thats great, and if not it was just nice to share a story.
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