jerking off

[Counselor]

Why not skip the whole question and have sex together?

[Armandork]

In all honesty its much too controlling to require no masterbaiting. I agree with Pix completely.

[Udabar]

I rarely jerk off as it is now, but when I am in a relationship I give up on jerking off and I just have sex. So the only time I will be getting off is when I am naked in bed alone with my man.

[megumidesu]

i agree with everyone who said that it's waaaayyyy too controlling 0__o

[Lalo]

Personally, I don't even have a problem with camming masturbation. IMO- being in a relationship does not give either partner the power or control to determine when a person can masturbate. That is trying to control a person's fantasies which is destructive to the person and ultimately to the relationship itself.

I don't find cam sex the least bit threatening or in any way even cheating. To me it is just another extension of modern technology that is available to help create fantasies. (looksies no feelsies)Seriously, every couple has to determine where to draw those lines, but conversations don't start with rules and ultimatums.

Demanding that your partner squelch his/her fantasies says more about a person's own insecurities and those types of insecurities are exactly what destroys many relationships.

[LateBloomer]

Personally, I don't even have a problem with camming masturbation. IMO- being in a relationship does not give either partner the power or control to determine when a person can masturbate. That is trying to control a person's fantasies which is destructive to the person and ultimately to the relationship itself.

I don't find cam sex the least bit threatening or in any way even cheating. To me it is just another extension of modern technology that is available to help create fantasies. (looksies no feelsies)Seriously, every couple has to determine where to draw those lines, but conversations don't start with rules and ultimatums.

Demanding that your partner squelch his/her fantasies says more about a person's own insecurities and those types of insecurities are exactly what destroys many relationships.

I totally agree that every couple needs to draw lines that define THEIR relationship.

If camming works in YOUR relationship, that's fine! Have a blast.

But successful relationships are based on compromise, sacrifice and negotiation. True, these conversations don't need to START with rules and ultimatums, but if we're drawing lines and setting boundaries then that's going to be the natural result (conclusion) of the conversation.

I have 2 rules, I've been quite clear about.
1) No violence
2) No cheating

And I define cheating as any activity that you wouldn't do with me in the same room.

[TimeSage]

I totally agree that every couple needs to draw lines that define THEIR relationship.

If camming works in YOUR relationship, that's fine! Have a blast.

But successful relationships are based on compromise, sacrifice and negotiation. True, these conversations don't need to START with rules and ultimatums, but if we're drawing lines and setting boundaries then that's going to be the natural result (conclusion) of the conversation.

I have 2 rules, I've been quite clear about.
1) No violence
2) No cheating

And I define cheating as any activity that you wouldn't do with me in the same room.

Then I'm pretty sure yours is cheating on you with the toilet.

[LateBloomer]

Then I'm pretty sure yours is cheating on you with the toilet.

Nope.

I already removed all the doors! New meaning to the term: OPEN RELATIONSHIP.

[NoOtherLove]

I don't have a problem
with my guy jerking off at all
as long as its not cam2cam or cybering.

[Woollyhats]

I don't think it would go over well if someone told me I wasn't allowed to jerk off. It'd be a bit of a Seriously, you just got creepily controlling moment. However, I understand why the camming bothered you, since he's basically letting other people stimulate him, even if they aren't physically present. That would bother me, and I'd flat out say I'd consider it cheating and a deal breaker.

It's cheating that's bothering you, not jerking off. Consider being a little less nazi in your rules, and work on compromising. No, your boyfriend shouldn't cam if you consider it cheating, and it hurts you that much, but you also shouldn't be able to control his life to such a drastic extent. Admittedly, maybe he didn't feel like it was cheating - everyone is different. Explain that. As for the "jerking off is forbidden" piece, I don't even know how you got someone to agree with that, to be honest.

Good luck!